tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-59153891782386268222024-03-19T05:20:41.239+01:00Spoleto's Unofficial Ambassador Franky FRANCESCAPAINTING scales & writing TALES... a disabled single AMERICAN mom raising her daughter in a little UMBRIAN villageUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger52125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-2008529102499584002011-06-07T16:28:00.001+02:002011-06-07T21:54:51.339+02:00Antonia's dental xrays posted for dentista qui...I am posting them here because the Ortho here can not open this... My life in italy. I will then send this link to her. I had the appointment now and this function with her opening them before our visit! Braces start next week!<br />
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</div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-23768700534305619132011-06-01T23:06:00.000+02:002011-06-01T23:06:03.791+02:00DeCo DivArtista, Tamara Lempicka unrolls the layers and increases the folds<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The ART ESCORT Franky Francesca's Critique of Tamara Lempicka's Exhibition in Roma, Italy as publicized on her </span></b><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">official website...</span></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyXt8hep-7-0Hn3LUPHYNr8pQ83ubH651XSwvhYoi_B_6BtzQcQnP7a8xBUgfrvYbZ9TNBbsO0g46bYLv4n0BJ0588kU9qGd2z8Q04IqSvvYRhn5fnsq_5cVBwAwsP7EVSti1wz6D3SZw/s1600/tamara+8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyXt8hep-7-0Hn3LUPHYNr8pQ83ubH651XSwvhYoi_B_6BtzQcQnP7a8xBUgfrvYbZ9TNBbsO0g46bYLv4n0BJ0588kU9qGd2z8Q04IqSvvYRhn5fnsq_5cVBwAwsP7EVSti1wz6D3SZw/s400/tamara+8.jpg" width="343" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
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</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><i><b>90 paintings, 30 drawings, 50 photographs, 2 short films and a hand full of her personal letters and news article reprints</b></i><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><i><b><br />
</b></i></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">She is an artist I have admired for years even researching her life well before getting near an original. This past week in Rome strolling along with friends I saw a fabric sign rippling in the wind with what I thought was her name. A hard and fast halt with a twist of my body, I ran to the fabric banner. Yes, it was Tamara! A show dedicated to just Tamara!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This is the location where I visited the Amadeus Modigliani exhibit in 2006. Although always interesting, the show had a very limited amount of works. So what if this is true of hers I thought?… As long as I get to see originals it’s worth it!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I texted my Italian ex-boyfriend Paolo and arranged an early breakfast for the following morning. After our cappuccini I said “I had a surprise”. We had not only seen the 2006 Modigliani exhibition together but the 2009 Rome Jeanne Michael Basquiat Exhibition too. With tickets in hand we climbed up the stairs to her gallery space, immediately I over whelmed and felt exuberant.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">DeCo DivArtista, Tamara Lempicka unrolls the layers and increases the folds, enmeshes full body with sleek and chic, then glazing monochromatic tones with isolated vibrant punches, chiaroscuro contrasts no doubt about it, her message is clear… LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME, WHILE I LOOK AWAY.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Never was I so taken aback by such strong works and sooooo many pieces. Just when I thought it would be finished, there was more. Here storyboards were filled with her life’s details exposing to me mistakes on Wikipedia about like her father’s death when she was just 5. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Her eccentric-ness for life, direct and flamboyant posture confirmed to me that some of us are just born this way. We are not pretending, we do not do this for others but we do have an endless need to communicate, to express and to over flow.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">After passing all works two times, I felt a bit depressed. I needed to leave this woman who I got to spend an afternoon with. I thought well about this way she laid out her compositions. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This “common compositional theme” and then it came to me. When I listened well and watch her audience of “glamorousa persona” is what I overheard, over and over and over… More silent than a whisper… I heard…<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;">“Look at me while I look away. I am soft, I am round, I am quiet, I am irresistible and I am a seductress.<o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I am powerful, I am important; I command my space and the structures surrounding my presence.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 224.75pt;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I flow easy, I layer in folds and I fill my curves.<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I am rectangular, I am straight, I am gay, I am square and I am full of angles.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I am diagonal and direct.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I am blunt, I am harsh and I am geometric like an Einstein equation.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I am to be studied, and in the meanwhile I will be erotic or powerful or strong in business or full of strength and importance.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I know you want to stare at me, so let me hold a pose for you to study and remember of me by. Again, I have a need to make a statement, look at me while I look away.”<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">In the end Tamara wins… She highlights what she wants your eye to see and where she wants it too finish. Her art reads commercialism with an Andy Warhol’s Campbell soup cans advertisement but with no end product being sold. Cropping her subjects, balancing unevenly weighted linear backgrounds, she creates profundity and debt in a 3 dimensional “persona” of her subjects.<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">A trendy, suggestive, provocative artist and her style, she was enlightened before her own time in the roaring 1920’s. Her memorizing black and white photos give an insight to the psyche of this amazing and under rated artist. …<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">TAMARA LEPICKA’S SHOW IN ROME IS A MUST SEE! A MUST DO AND A MUST BRAG ABOUT!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Critiqued by Francesca Owens "YOUR ART ESCORT"</span><o:p></o:p></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-15831493906264789982011-05-30T09:32:00.004+02:002011-05-30T11:18:02.396+02:00time for a word change from woody to metally<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbWjmFBCAsKjt9XYeANuv8edNvgwvHfOv8Z9CKmGYxIVcWWNz3aTJJnDZxyoxWZxJBdyLabNhrr9_COh6Hp_4_jNaQEl1LPLkUucjT-7GUimF4NSR5mvd4GslmimjI0USCAsm4iNlM9Cg/s1600/penis+blood+flow.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnlmpgV8iTWQ9P_3CvQ_nKhtQOgGNYllhcM5q76DV5P2prAKBlDfdRYklOu159UJ5V3HTAM43Kg1aFSLiJBZDrmtV1NOV7bbCxMhTlpGctc6cZZL5oTbBxrJTbxtV2LIYm6BHTFn8P4aM/s1600/cat+mask+arms+up+34161_404350148281_575273281_4461979_2169034_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnlmpgV8iTWQ9P_3CvQ_nKhtQOgGNYllhcM5q76DV5P2prAKBlDfdRYklOu159UJ5V3HTAM43Kg1aFSLiJBZDrmtV1NOV7bbCxMhTlpGctc6cZZL5oTbBxrJTbxtV2LIYm6BHTFn8P4aM/s400/cat+mask+arms+up+34161_404350148281_575273281_4461979_2169034_n.jpg" width="398" /></a></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; margin-top: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: x-large;"></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">A fellow reader responds with a question to my Dr. Shake It blog post this week.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; tab-stops: 153.8pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">I think some words from a fellow genius would be appropriate on this topic before we explore this intriguing phenomenon so I invited my friend <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">LEO</i></b> to further explain his thoughts.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span class="apple-style-span"><b><i><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">"The penis does not obey the order of its master, who tries to erect or shrink it at will. Instead, the penis erects freely while its master is asleep. The penis must be said to have its own mind, by any stretch of the imagination."</span></span></i></b></span><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div align="right" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: right;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span class="apple-style-span"><b><i><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px;">Leonardo da Vinci</span></span></i></b></span><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div align="center" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">Dear Ms. Big Boobs,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">I am SO glad you get rid of the idiot before you even begin, so to speak! Honesty: do you think your boobs (and I am being serious here) attract LOTS of "bad" men? I mean, more than a flat chested woman? My big boobed friends seem to get a lot of side glances, if not straight on - glance - at - chest/breast etc. Just wondering. It's like first you have to fight off the perverts, which can take a long while since there are so many out there, and there's a pervert in every man if you ask me, until finally you get to the a man who has qualities that show beyond his testerone lurkings..<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">Dear I'm So Glad, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">(so as to protect their identity)<o:p></o:p></i></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">1<sup>st </sup></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">Let's start with an anatomically correct drawing of a penis, sited above. Though personally I have never seen one with that type of bend, I don't know why... I always thought they were straight!</span></span><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">2<sup>nd </sup>It has been my opinion for some time that my breast surgeon doctor slipped MAGNETS into my porn sized breast implants without my consent. <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">3<sup>rd </sup></span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"> </span></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">I believe men have 2 little brains down there that are the size of a marble but it is not glass, it is some type of metal. The metal marbles get transferred during the insertion and conception process into what they call “their balls”. It’s something that scientifically usually happens to only baby boys. How else could we justify this behavior my men once they are grown?</span></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">4<sup>th </sup>For this I propose a name change to what has been called a <b><i>WOODY</i></b> for years. I think a <b><i>METALLY</i></b></span></span><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"> would be more appropriate for the lifting action of their penis. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">5<sup>th </sup>I accept full responsibility for my <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">GEMILLI</i></b>’s (my twins as they are called here) bad behavior at times. Ever since their debut at the 2010 Spoleto's Festival<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span>of the Two Words, then their real live TV interviews (notice I stated plural), "they have taken on a life of their own" quotes Mama Francesca.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">When asked by the local TV camera men and the local village people, "Mama Francesca, where did these come from? Where have you hid them for the past 3 years?" Calmly and frankly Mama Francesca responded "it was their 18th birthday and I dressed them for their coming out into society party, something like a </span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/D%C3%A9butante">Débutante</a> </span></span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">ball".</span></span><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">Well the news hit the street in Spoleto and the air is filled with the buzz of olives and boobs.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">6<sup>th </sup> It's not men’s fault at all. The piece of metal in their pants is so heavy that when they try to lift it they get a METALLY. ALL their blood flow stops going to the small brain in their head on their shoulders and remains below the waist over loading their <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">METALLY.</i></b><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">7<sup>th </sup>Also when asked by men here in the village, “what is your bra size? What number are you?” I have trained my twins to respond with the upmost surprise to such an insulting question and in a manner fitting of a </span><span class="apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/D%C3%A9butante">Débutante</a></span></span><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">, not stooping down to their level. So they respond, “I don’t know but for surely a porn sized number!” That usually leaves with their jaw dropped open...<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">8<sup>th </sup>In conclusion how can I Mama Francesca judge these poor men with metal marbles in their balls, when my own twins (and I am at times ashamed), behave so badly? </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">9</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;">th </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"> So NO it is not Men's fault. Further medical studies are needed to identify the type of metal in these marbles. Some of the leading national experts believe it they could be LEAD METAL which is a </span><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toxic_metal" style="font-family: Schoolbell;">TOXIC METAl</a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"> leading to insanity. So let's not start with the "name calling" "</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;">Dear I'm So Glad" and let's wait for more solid research!</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;">Kisses bella! </span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">By the way, the media men and movie cameras are arriving in less than 3 weeks for this grand annual event!</span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-55363648437643872772011-05-30T00:12:00.000+02:002011-05-30T00:12:00.104+02:00maury's deal on patio furniture and sol lewitt's sanctuary<div class="almost_half_cell" id="gt-res-content" style="display: block; padding-right: 16px; padding-top: 9px;"><div dir="ltr" style="zoom: 1;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-ItAAtu04YmEj5h56v3wJl_NZAxkIVTNlLw_4VLhCLSEOgDeObQ3EzW3Gs1NA3aCN3kJULN_5uwm_JW1e8oty3YHIPYRAigUTTC1wiPYCvK2JrvkewDzVKXGQ9W-qzapnWEf5FUJIDeI/s1600/Cruise+001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-ItAAtu04YmEj5h56v3wJl_NZAxkIVTNlLw_4VLhCLSEOgDeObQ3EzW3Gs1NA3aCN3kJULN_5uwm_JW1e8oty3YHIPYRAigUTTC1wiPYCvK2JrvkewDzVKXGQ9W-qzapnWEf5FUJIDeI/s400/Cruise+001.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">Steve & I loading my new patio furniture <br />
on the roof of his taxi car</span></td></tr>
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; color: #888888; font-family: arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4Ah_aI2Tj1BZ7f05jrv03aay_MoLL6IMFLul4ZRXtE_os9-HJnfQ0pQGPd2yb2wpB4m_LQ4WoFtrpyajGeO2zjeUqliuwUHs6WW-Xw3HrzDbDU2oEVEbM2oVGEw72cMUi8xNRgSy7xRw/s1600/salotto+trilly+choc.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="176" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4Ah_aI2Tj1BZ7f05jrv03aay_MoLL6IMFLul4ZRXtE_os9-HJnfQ0pQGPd2yb2wpB4m_LQ4WoFtrpyajGeO2zjeUqliuwUHs6WW-Xw3HrzDbDU2oEVEbM2oVGEw72cMUi8xNRgSy7xRw/s400/salotto+trilly+choc.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span class="long_text" id="result_box" style="display: block;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white;" title="Salotto Trilly white, set4 pezzi, con struttura in ferro trattato per esterno, intreccio in">Chocolate colored, 4 piece set outdoor patio furniture made from treated iron, weaved </span><span style="background-color: white; color: black;" title="polyrattan.Compresi cuscini color sabbia, fodere cuscini 100% polyestere.">poly-rattan material and sand-colored polyester cushions. </span></span></span><span class="long_text" id="result_box" style="display: block;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black;" title="polyrattan.Compresi cuscini color sabbia, fodere cuscini 100% polyestere."><br />
</span></span></span><span class="long_text" id="result_box" style="display: block;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black;" title="polyrattan.Compresi cuscini color sabbia, fodere cuscini 100% polyestere.">A "festa" addition to my outdoor courtyard garden. When I sat out there for the first time and heard the little birds... I thought... Sol Lewitt sat here too listening to the prior generations of these birds. Google Sol and you will see he is the father of conceptualism and he painted his commanded career art here, in the apartment underneath mine.</span></span></span><span class="long_text" id="result_box" style="display: block;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black;" title="polyrattan.Compresi cuscini color sabbia, fodere cuscini 100% polyestere."><br />
</span></span></span><span class="long_text" id="result_box" style="display: block;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black;" title="polyrattan.Compresi cuscini color sabbia, fodere cuscini 100% polyestere.">It like have a special sanctuary to art's past where ideas arrived and where completed. All this insight and wisdom because I bought an outdoor patio set to throw cocktails party with!</span></span></span><span class="long_text" id="result_box" style="display: block;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; color: black;" title="polyrattan.Compresi cuscini color sabbia, fodere cuscini 100% polyestere."><br />
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<div class="g-section" id="gt-res-tools" style="display: inline-block; margin-top: 16px; vertical-align: top; width: 620px; zoom: 1;"></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-40962181569768812062011-05-28T15:06:00.005+02:002011-05-28T22:53:43.367+02:00francesca’s little merry go round of life... the world of friends as I see it<div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Dr. Shake It, my Darling</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">…</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">I am a unique SAGE cutting my own path. People who are closest me to me usually love me deeply & keep me for life even with all my flaws. So when you say, </span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">“</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Francesca, I can be a good friend</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">”</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"> it’s all relative, your definition or mine</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">…<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><i><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: #f4cccc; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">CYBER HAREM:</span></i></b></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">are woman being kept in a man's internet dream world & </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"> </span></b><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">does not qualify for a true friendship.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">LIFERS</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">:</span></i></b></span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">are my inner circle of friends. They are invited into my heart, my space, my world & my mind. With these friends we exchange honesty, secrets, vulnerability, simple sheer pleasures, emotional intimacy, genuine unconditional love & mutual acceptance of our flaws.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">FLIGHT WEIGHTERS</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">:</span></i></b></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">are friends that take part in my life</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">…</span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"> usually they are near to me & we do things together. Some of them develop into <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Lifers</i></b>. Of course often these friendships can be carried through my lifetime but some fall by the waist side & linger for years. Pure honestly & mutual acceptance of our flaws has not been established or secured yet. It’s a garden that takes time to see where they grow.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">FROOT CAMP</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">:</span></i></b></span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">is a place where these are people who are allowed to enter become a <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Lifer. </i></b>Usually at some time a conflict has arose & we both demonstrated the ability to resolve with it with some level of dignity & mutual self-respect. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">FWANNA BEES</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">:</span></i></b></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">are my followers in the world at large who have the opportunity to meet me. I open my life to about all that I meet, without reservation & without inhibition. They find me crazy & refreshing in one swoop. They are often afraid to walk this line of being eccentric but like being near me. Living their life close to enough to me allows them to my droppings of excitement & passion for life. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">FRAPARAZZI</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">:</span></i></b></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">are my paparazzi. They merely find me intriguing in some way that they want to follow my life’s adventure and tribulations from their lazy boy chair with the foot pad raised.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">VAMPIRINI</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">:</span></i></b></span><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">are successful at </span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: lime; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">“</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: lime; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">NID</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: lime; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">”</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: lime; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"> or </span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: lime; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">“</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: lime; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">Negative IV drips'</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">. </span></i></b><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">They are people who suck the life out of others. After 2 separate hospital stays of 17 days & 4 months of tri weekly blood draws for Coumadin resistance, I have no tolerance for <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">vampirini.</i></b> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #f4cccc;"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">FRANDS WITH BENEFITS</span></i></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';">:</span></i></b></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><o:p></o:p></span></i></b></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">are friends where we find a mutually beneficial foundation, whether its art sponsorship or travel or creative projects, we develop our dreams. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 13pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS'; font-size: large;"><b><i style="background-color: #f4cccc;">FEUNUCHS:</i></b></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">are my counter position to a man's cyber harem, they are my eunuchs but with all of nature equipment in tact from nature with the intent of me being their exclusive focus... all applicants to date have been a little too young for my current values... or missing some quality i am looking for but thats open to change... no applications accepted yet... </span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><i style="background-color: #f4cccc;">FRISTRACTORS:</i></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">are people who distract me from my life's purpose. They usually get reduced to my FRAPARAZZI list.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">remember it's my blog.... and I get to talk about what I want...</span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><div class="MsoNoSpacing"><span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">So Dr. Shake It, what's it gonna be...?</span></span><br />
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</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-82258225312762149222011-05-27T21:35:00.001+02:002011-05-30T21:02:58.171+02:00DECO DIVARTISTA Tamara Lempicka "queen of modern" an art deco diva artista<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>I've been there,</b></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>I've done this,</b></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>I say it's...</b></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>a don't miss </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>exhibition!</b></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZVaqPF4viJZupKMY4PFpnmraNxTmZTptYzljD14P7zc955P3dTdDuHXThIhMEz_EpqFTNmEMseafWsEqf0gN3JxjpT1dVhNdeT4Tmq8DuYiu32Y0QjQqJ2jSlDFRqBjmrSFAdI-FS6x4/s1600/tamara1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZVaqPF4viJZupKMY4PFpnmraNxTmZTptYzljD14P7zc955P3dTdDuHXThIhMEz_EpqFTNmEMseafWsEqf0gN3JxjpT1dVhNdeT4Tmq8DuYiu32Y0QjQqJ2jSlDFRqBjmrSFAdI-FS6x4/s400/tamara1.jpg" width="317" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCjUf_yoiALskh2XTjPbyCoOWN3bUxSFqcFGaYQIRk4CeHXhx9HEgLHv-Msbey25qaHwVN2qcroUv92pKYxLd-lONYeJN2CaN6EOWvWGMM3A-woM1PRUgsvE40ffTXqLPL8gwo7-5VQxw/s1600/tamara2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCjUf_yoiALskh2XTjPbyCoOWN3bUxSFqcFGaYQIRk4CeHXhx9HEgLHv-Msbey25qaHwVN2qcroUv92pKYxLd-lONYeJN2CaN6EOWvWGMM3A-woM1PRUgsvE40ffTXqLPL8gwo7-5VQxw/s400/tamara2.jpg" width="247" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicqLbAPu2IolsMRfG5yqCuVvNlzM03feO0HKX0435fhyphenhyphengnxX_hDO2FBSN8lDpjUFoVDMYRDLy3PG8kKe9EFxycZee9J67Fm3vQCaRkPjbvpYRXHWYcRc2iyUgiwaB3B4rRxHgRAaX3D70/s1600/tamara3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="278" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicqLbAPu2IolsMRfG5yqCuVvNlzM03feO0HKX0435fhyphenhyphengnxX_hDO2FBSN8lDpjUFoVDMYRDLy3PG8kKe9EFxycZee9J67Fm3vQCaRkPjbvpYRXHWYcRc2iyUgiwaB3B4rRxHgRAaX3D70/s400/tamara3.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTH8cszgGZ7BK1hblgyA1pg16Za41Pjiu-DqMXU6q6Y1xp9Z_9LPY1W3ZUlyGnzc6_POXigqQu2YDDlm2mZnPZFoBMh8zcDISnNmhmJ6LE6A1YJVbmjYFbv5KugiB-uVXZAT-6MIVx1zk/s1600/tamara4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTH8cszgGZ7BK1hblgyA1pg16Za41Pjiu-DqMXU6q6Y1xp9Z_9LPY1W3ZUlyGnzc6_POXigqQu2YDDlm2mZnPZFoBMh8zcDISnNmhmJ6LE6A1YJVbmjYFbv5KugiB-uVXZAT-6MIVx1zk/s400/tamara4.jpg" width="291" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgxw7gDkJAknC5Jhk7tnYhDZUygGF_pv2kPY8k26SbVn-JEQNNjFhamio3Iq65BexAtuiPM_iGcAV6siNMQTj7QlYRr8trlRNXyWvP-u0yY5E4sqgphZfJYadwzZxVp9ihfmxYxTV6UC8/s1600/tamara5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgxw7gDkJAknC5Jhk7tnYhDZUygGF_pv2kPY8k26SbVn-JEQNNjFhamio3Iq65BexAtuiPM_iGcAV6siNMQTj7QlYRr8trlRNXyWvP-u0yY5E4sqgphZfJYadwzZxVp9ihfmxYxTV6UC8/s400/tamara5.jpg" width="305" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb1SZk4T1_GlJovkSbUPCsJ86pTJMh2wO35K7pnKiTjUCRfHdPFN6_tC558KqTVWCADaDl0EkQzZqiI5t8UhcEJ6lq5M6a_qXcW9iTLJJIzsg_d87NLlhx7MJajTaBAO8mG45Vx5inPAw/s1600/tamara6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb1SZk4T1_GlJovkSbUPCsJ86pTJMh2wO35K7pnKiTjUCRfHdPFN6_tC558KqTVWCADaDl0EkQzZqiI5t8UhcEJ6lq5M6a_qXcW9iTLJJIzsg_d87NLlhx7MJajTaBAO8mG45Vx5inPAw/s400/tamara6.jpg" width="300" /></a></div><br />
<div class="eventDescription" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; border-collapse: collapse; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; line-height: 25px; width: 515px;">The new art exhibitions season at Complesso </div><div class="eventDescription" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; border-collapse: collapse; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; line-height: 25px; width: 515px;">Monumentale del Vittoriano</div><div class="eventDescription" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; border-collapse: collapse; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; line-height: 25px; width: 515px;">in Rome opens with the exhibition</div><div class="eventDescription" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; border-collapse: collapse; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; line-height: 25px; width: 515px;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">''Tamara de Lempicka. La regina del moderno”</span></b><br />
<b>Address:</b> Via San Pietro in Carcere (Rome)<br />
<b>Hours:</b> MON-THU: 9.30-19.30 FRI-SAT: 9.30-23.30 SUN: 9.30-20.30<br />
<b>Tel:</b> 063225380</div><div class="eventLimits" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; border-collapse: collapse; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; line-height: 25px;"><b>Dates of this event</b><br />
10/03/2011 - 03/07/2011</div><div class="eventWebsite" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; border-collapse: collapse; color: #333333; font-family: Georgia, 'Times New Roman', Times, serif; font-size: 12px; line-height: 25px;">Web Site:<u> <a href="http://www.beniculturali.it/mibac/export/MiBAC/sito-MiBAC/Contenuti/MibacUnif/Eventi/visualizza_asset.html_2095159041.html" style="color: #006600;" title="new window">http://www.beniculturali.it/mibac/export/MiBAC/sito-MiBAC/Contenuti/MibacUnif/Eventi/visualizza_asset.html_2095159041.html</a></u></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-18359609574303541632011-05-21T23:53:00.000+02:002011-05-21T23:53:42.441+02:00tattoos, CPTSD & disorder of extreme stress not other wise specified<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiSUBzZMuAgK98wEKnjvn5RNB0sfh_QKxLmbj6Fe9hW74IJav-bgnLvn-6HhXlNflfGLmcFQN6RpGRrYK5mLDQ-rCFS01zWB0vsmTq8vVaLiyi1we_9IqLyilU1sdLRg3nMbIvDLv_8O8/s1600/051307_1613.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiSUBzZMuAgK98wEKnjvn5RNB0sfh_QKxLmbj6Fe9hW74IJav-bgnLvn-6HhXlNflfGLmcFQN6RpGRrYK5mLDQ-rCFS01zWB0vsmTq8vVaLiyi1we_9IqLyilU1sdLRg3nMbIvDLv_8O8/s1600/051307_1613.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">first tattoo NAM MYO HO RENGE KYO on my wrist</span></td></tr>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWICNhlLoJOhGA1dS11k3RQoVDADnB3o_JvYj2GSkoEVv5wyMX94VW64F6xmk-qo901BFk5D5pIb4lVnbZ7sxEC_45Yhqwg10HUqdAjwf8tvgz4189ijSxVniy8XKllzaT0fOHfeCqLGA/s1600/051307_1614.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWICNhlLoJOhGA1dS11k3RQoVDADnB3o_JvYj2GSkoEVv5wyMX94VW64F6xmk-qo901BFk5D5pIb4lVnbZ7sxEC_45Yhqwg10HUqdAjwf8tvgz4189ijSxVniy8XKllzaT0fOHfeCqLGA/s1600/051307_1614.jpg" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJsdUax89Kf9lnbfeWZvD7IiF0vCB9NUhZazrNYG9ZYxvTLOfgWprqwD0cgqPp2C1uaBtrWYRf9hs9WGZf25r3kHfqCiGzVSR4gGnlF2y9pIlolS0NF8LS8w0ddoA90YvbGAfRwmbgdS0/s1600/051307_1614a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJsdUax89Kf9lnbfeWZvD7IiF0vCB9NUhZazrNYG9ZYxvTLOfgWprqwD0cgqPp2C1uaBtrWYRf9hs9WGZf25r3kHfqCiGzVSR4gGnlF2y9pIlolS0NF8LS8w0ddoA90YvbGAfRwmbgdS0/s1600/051307_1614a.jpg" /></a></div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh14QtDAnjqg5e4e55LvqHXvu03kIhdN5JhQIUwUoJoHjGcPoZ38es56K7cMciRK4P2G97w1FWXC7MGmzWY830hpM_CHvQnzP0JtmZ5OTQxMkyvMnP-PD9SxAZjtrl6MBbe9UAAmhU0-DM/s1600/7-29-07+040.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh14QtDAnjqg5e4e55LvqHXvu03kIhdN5JhQIUwUoJoHjGcPoZ38es56K7cMciRK4P2G97w1FWXC7MGmzWY830hpM_CHvQnzP0JtmZ5OTQxMkyvMnP-PD9SxAZjtrl6MBbe9UAAmhU0-DM/s320/7-29-07+040.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">2nd tattoo my Edwards heart ring and a destroyed heart self image</span></td></tr>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2UDJOn3GrJH6rR4FvaMxS1DBZT9F_f7G2dX4dYCGsEDvMip-26TD0yOH68GW9f4eBrxiXuVYZYiqwHULzDWfr6qJa2WAJGqoSlDEmOssTrUGghWHK0BL3YyoPIY5tuwTvHXiGyBWUPuM/s1600/7-29-07+041.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2UDJOn3GrJH6rR4FvaMxS1DBZT9F_f7G2dX4dYCGsEDvMip-26TD0yOH68GW9f4eBrxiXuVYZYiqwHULzDWfr6qJa2WAJGqoSlDEmOssTrUGghWHK0BL3YyoPIY5tuwTvHXiGyBWUPuM/s320/7-29-07+041.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyV435FmQ_tT8a6gc2W0URt4wg8QXcN3nR1YFhBNfiHMN-TPTziE42qCOD3CVchY3O54besjcbN1xUqZd10p__kVXEjjgbIuJVHRffl8CFC4U_Zsl_W9ECjwwFt-Nx3MPsK_brlHZKPUo/s1600/7-29-07+042.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyV435FmQ_tT8a6gc2W0URt4wg8QXcN3nR1YFhBNfiHMN-TPTziE42qCOD3CVchY3O54besjcbN1xUqZd10p__kVXEjjgbIuJVHRffl8CFC4U_Zsl_W9ECjwwFt-Nx3MPsK_brlHZKPUo/s320/7-29-07+042.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzMSwtDmteffHCQfJmnfQrpFmLEFkSDaHg8062BjhcwjAAO2Uq7kAE2kseqebwstlr5_w4i2vGbjR17OjUdNskjsm4Uu0YcAvjrqd_MCYUbO1s9mU4XMEbTXfnvVQ5Xd9gvwP-0crruJc/s1600/7-29-07+043.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzMSwtDmteffHCQfJmnfQrpFmLEFkSDaHg8062BjhcwjAAO2Uq7kAE2kseqebwstlr5_w4i2vGbjR17OjUdNskjsm4Uu0YcAvjrqd_MCYUbO1s9mU4XMEbTXfnvVQ5Xd9gvwP-0crruJc/s320/7-29-07+043.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR3yvx6jvk9-8wOOa80r-QZgg_W8fvC6G3YJd9obhWONqpQGMXpW4b-MDdZkvDRFJS0sPYGMNqOH4Evt94Pri4tU5v3ha6blJpN-uIbmJj0yopuNaAwW1p7YHJfOgEO32ZM_smY0fbWW0/s1600/7-29-07+044.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR3yvx6jvk9-8wOOa80r-QZgg_W8fvC6G3YJd9obhWONqpQGMXpW4b-MDdZkvDRFJS0sPYGMNqOH4Evt94Pri4tU5v3ha6blJpN-uIbmJj0yopuNaAwW1p7YHJfOgEO32ZM_smY0fbWW0/s320/7-29-07+044.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">tiger in Tibetan -I needed to be reminded I am a tiger and I will recover</span></td></tr>
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</span><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I believe it was around Mother's day 2007 when the last woven fibers in my emotional being became unraveled...</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I had mentally disturbing images that would not let me be in touch with my feelings and felt out of touch with reality. I had always hated tattoos and was often mad at my oldest daughter for getting them. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">It was a moment in my life where the art needed to come out but could not be released. So the image in my head for what I wanted to express started being designed.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I finally decided I was ready. The over whelming desire to cut myself to try to feel some sense of being grounded was over whelming and I knew why thoughts were not sane, not rational, but overwhelming like it was a must in my life.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I talked with my oldest daughter and she agreed to go with me for my first tattoo. I believe getting a tattoo could release these foreign emotions in a minimally acceptable damaging way.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The first planned tattoo Idea went well. Oddly enough the pain felt good. I was in charge of the pain the needles gave me instead of the vampire at the heart hospital coming in morning noon and night to do blood draws, and IV.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">My veins had become hardened and some closed, scarred or collapse from being poked into. Then there would be the re-poking... when the needle got caught in the scar tissue and a new re-poke would be needed.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This first round went well and held me at bay for a while... It felt soothing, secure, a strong sense of being grounded and knowing for a moment I was level.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">It didn't take much time before the float would start again... then again a second tattooing phase was started but very calculated. Knowing that this still was not very mentally sable of myself... I designed in my head the image that I thought I could live with. I tweaked it and adjusted it and sat with it till I felt I could live with it. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Round two was burned into my art at a stronger, larger intensity. Again, the pain felt good and I even felt more decisive that this was the thing to do.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The last phase came in late October 2007 before I fled the USA. I finalized what I thought would be the strongest message but artist value would be retained. I sought out my Tibetan friend to translate both of my daughters names into his native tongue. Then I asked for heart and tiger to be translated.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The second phase of my bleeding heart tattoo with my Edwards heart ring and my favorite paint brush where completed with my two daughters names, heart for love and health and tiger symbol for me to focus on finding my strength.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">As the wounds were new and still bleeding, I ran off to KINKOS to photocopy my newest art. I blew them up in color and added then to the MY MODIGLIANI, LAUTREC & VAN GOGH BLUES exhibition.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I tattoos were fresh, the art exhibition was ready, all my hired partners were in place and I fled the USA.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">My art opening was to be November 2, 2007. On October 30, 2007 I left the USA to find a hiding place for a while. Three and a half years later, I am still here, Spoleto ITALY..</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div><br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-76093768290808456882011-05-21T15:48:00.000+02:002011-05-21T15:48:55.865+02:00war wounds of C-PTSD and night terrors<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>When night terrors arrive a C-PTSD sufferer will relive</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>the </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>violence while sleeping. They use their body, legs </b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>and arms </b></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">swinging & scratching to fight off the perpetrator.</span></b></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQwEQG-OnB6V4nt_lLjUMHIxuo_sF7bvoaR5dyf8mWqQc6nvk7sOaH-fZNQWmhSyUpmyPpz-_OE2RF8jTQDmu48rZkf2Eq3feUHrNMJfxCiKXuzeEDOMeF_eZlm0CRKlHF_Zu5APxq1h8/s1600/mynighterror.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><img border="0" height="295" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQwEQG-OnB6V4nt_lLjUMHIxuo_sF7bvoaR5dyf8mWqQc6nvk7sOaH-fZNQWmhSyUpmyPpz-_OE2RF8jTQDmu48rZkf2Eq3feUHrNMJfxCiKXuzeEDOMeF_eZlm0CRKlHF_Zu5APxq1h8/s400/mynighterror.JPG" width="400" /></span></b></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">I fought all night to save the 13 Columbine victims from<br />
the 2 perpetrators. They all lived in my night terror<br />
but when I woke up, my face was swollen, scratched<br />
and bruised. The bags under my eyes from no sleep.</span></b></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b><br />
</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>In the very last night terror of this 18 month period, I</b></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><b>in </b></span><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">the dream managed to save the life of my girlfriend's killed daughter but this last time I had to give my life</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">up to </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">have </span></b><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">her escape. This story is dedicated to:</span></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;">Anglea Fite.</span></b></div><div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Late in October 2007 I visited my then stock brokerage firm to wrap up loose ends before running to Italy to take cover. </span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I felt the need to talk with the office manager about what had been happening with body memory flashbacks and </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">telling their stories of arriving on violent new deaths,my office manager opened up and shared her daughter's finally 24 hours of life. Her daughter was </span><a href="http://extras.denverpost.com/news/ax0711c.htm" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">Angela Fite</a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">. </span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I arrived in Italy October 31, 2007 and little did I know what was going to be the next six months of my life. The finally dream was of Angela. In my dream she lived. I forced her out the door and I turned and gave my life in order to slow him down from getting her. I told her to run, run go, let him have me.</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">As I lodged my body between the door stopping him, I turned and the axe was coming down on me. I woke up swinging my arms and screaming and was confused. This was April 1, 2008 but it took </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">2 months later when back in Colorado and driving up to the office, that this dream re-appeared in my eyes. I sat paralyzed in my car remembering who I had saved this night in my dreams.</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">It took till October 2008 before I could write her mother, my friend and tell her. Before then I was too afraid to do so. So this is just 1 example of the information arriving October 2007 and it haunted me continuously for 1 year till I saved her.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">My night terror for Angela was the final and worst of this 18 month living HELL. Finally my mind felt light and clean enough to be freed of any responsibility for these events I had nothing to do with.</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">----- Original Message ------ </span></div></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f;"></span></span></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Received: </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Mon, 17 Mar 2008 12:31:27 PM MDT</span></span></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>From: </b>JoyceB3955@aol.com</span></span></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b></b></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b>To: </b>francescaod@usa.net</span></b></span></span></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b></b></span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b>Subject: </b>Re: a columbine survivor...I have a few questions </span></b></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dear Francesca:</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This is Joyce from Gift From Within. I sent your email to Dr. Ochberg and he responded using our Q&A format. What I mean by that statement is that at times we receive very thoughtful questions that other people have asked even though the event and wording are different. Frank believes the issues you raise are well stated and would be useful to other people who visit our website. see</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.giftfromwithin.org/html/qna.html" id="usa-link" style="color: #000099; outline-color: initial; outline-style: none; outline-width: initial; text-decoration: underline;" target="_blank">http://www.giftfromwithin.org/html/qna.html</a> </span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">After reading his answers perhaps you will allow me to publish this on our Q&A page and we can take out together references which will give you anonymity, and us protection i.e. like not referring to Unum a specific insurance company in a public format. Let me know which references you think we should hide. Warm regards, Joyce</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></span></div></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dear Joyce,</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Ms. O. writes a compelling email, describing several profound traumatic events, including direct exposure to an infamous high school massacre (while caring for many elementary school children) and, approximately six years later, open heart surgery, and insurance company problems. Ms. O does not give details of other life traumas, but says there were many, that the pain is still powerful and debilitating, and that relocation to a beautiful part of Italy and the presence of an excellent therapist is helpful, but not enough. Dissociation (an altered state of consciousness that serves as a defense against overwhelming anxiety) once seemed to lessen the pain of searing memory. Meditation helps to a limited extent. There are good days. But bad days are so bad that, on those days, life seems not worth living. Ms. O does not ask for remedy, but rather for an honest prognosis. "What can I expect long term?," she asks of us.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">First, thank you Ms. O for writing and for the obvious inspiration and care you have given others. You are an artist and you have guided young people. Artists often distill human experience, seeing and feeling the essence of reality, suffering when others suffer. Having an eye for beauty may not balance the experience of traumatic and tragic loss. Finding grace and meaning in nature may not erase the memory of senseless harm to an innocent adolescent. But your artistic ability is worth emphasizing. Several of my patients with complex PTSD are artists or writers or reporters. They do see into the heart of things. That talent is a blessing and a curse. Try to remember the fact that it is a gift; try to use that gift; try to identify with others who used such gifts to enlighten the rest of us. CBT - cognitive behavioral therapy- works in a simple way. When the bad days and the bad feelings are too much with us, we learn to think about the talent we have and to respect it. We may not be able to use it during a period of fear, grief or depression. But we need to know it is there and it will be there to be used when the crisis passes.</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This is different from trying to be numb or from longing for respite from memory. This is saying to oneself, "I am an artist. I am more sensitive. Sensitivity is painful, but useful. Others have this condition and I respect them for it."</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The fact that your insurance company (and other bureaucracies) are oblivious to your condition and appear to care more about their bottom line than your legal right to just compensation is familiar to me -and to others with complex PTSD. Jonathan Shay, in his profound book, "Achilles in Vietnam," notes that since ancient times, the traumatically injured have suffered more from injustice that from horrifying wounds. Whether the source of betrayal is King Agamemnon's greed or an insensitive insurance adjustor, we are profoundly affected by the loss of honor, justice and humanity. My team, writing the diagnosis PTSD, had no language to capture this philosophical symptom -a loss of a sense of meaning. But anyone who works with complex PTSD knows to look for that ancient wound, to give voice to it, and in so doing, to guide a person toward recovery of dignity and worth.</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Your relocation from America to Italy speaks to this wound. It is not unusual to seek a different home when home has harbored trauma and injustice.</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">And now to the question at hand. Can this complex injury in a sensitive person be tolerated? Can the long term prognosis include substantial recovery? </span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I believe it can. I have seen it happen in cases that included the murder of ones children and the destruction of ones platoon due to incompetence of leadership. It never happens easily. Some denial of reality is often part of the path to tolerance. Shakespeare's line in Lear was not unreal: "As flies to wanton boys are we to the gods; they kill us for their sport." But reality is as beautiful as it is ugly and meaningless. The capacity to experience that beauty comes through deliberate acts of seeing and knowing. You cannot avoid seeing the tragic, whether it is the past, present or future. But you can learn to see the sources of hope and love. That does come back and it does prevail, despite cruelty and incompetence and indifference, which are the sources of complex PTSD.</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Recovery is never absolute. We do not reach a life that is free of sadness. But the sharp pain of traumatic memory does reduce in amplitude and surprise. You may need to work with a specialist who uses the counting method or EMDR or some form of re-exposure, if that has not yet been part of your therapy. You may need to work with someone who uses CBT as I suggest above, tailoring this CBT to your unique set of skills and losses. A good therapist is always wise and supportive, but a specialist may be needed to help deal with debilitating aspects of complex PTSD. With time and distance, new sources of fulfillment and meaning should emerge. One can't escape the past without a present and future that holds promise. </span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">There is every reason to believe that you will find those sources of fulfillment, and can say to yourself:</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"I may never forget, but I need not constantly remember." Shakespeare didn't write that line. I did. And I based it on many, many life stories.</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">My very best to you, Ms. O.</span></span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dear Joyce,</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><table style="border-collapse: collapse; color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Subject:</span></div></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">a columbine survivor...I have a few questions </span></div></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"></div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Date:</span></div></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">02:28 PM MDT, 03/16/08</span></div></div></div></div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">From:</span></div></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><form style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"Francesca Owens" <francescaod@usa.net></span></div></div></div></div></form></td></tr>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">To:</span></div></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><JoyceB3955@aol.com></span></div></div></div></div><div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div></div></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I googled Columbine PTSD to see if I could find any one else suffering from PTSD. I found your and Dr. Frank Ochberg's Q & A. My name is Francesca Owens and former Littleton, Colorado resident. Currently I am living in Umbria Italy because I can't handle the USA any more.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">April 19th, 1999 three parents, 2 elementary school teachers and 60 6th graders went on a field trip. We walked from Leawood Elementary school through Columbine High School grounds to the Columbine Public Library. We were the first responders after the event. The high school students fled the school running to the closest open building, us.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The librarians, three parents and two teachers were the beginning of the command post. The police showed up with military, firefighters and then media. We supported the police the whole day until they allowed us parents to leave at about 6:00 p.m. One of the mothers and I with our kids walked on the school grounds that day after the event not being current on the news as we only saw from within our windows what was going on. It wasn't till we got home that we saw the full story on the news ands that there were bombs in the field we walked across after the event.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I am suffering from severe complex ptsd and can barely handle it any more. I have a wonderful therapist here. I am currently out on disability with a private policy from Unum insurance company. They do not believe me and contact with them is just an extension of abuse for me, though maybe I am not in reality.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I have a life long list of trauma and was a high profile functioning person in society till I had open heart surgery a 1 1/2 ago at 44 yoa. New trauma in ICU came back 9 months later in horrible flashbacks.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I know therapy is a must. I have done some PTSD. I do some meditation. I am an artist, and ex stock broker now. I search the Internet endlessly looking for that magic pill for fix this all.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">When the pain starts, I want out. Good days are good and some can be great. Though bad days are horrible and horrible days are on the edge of not wanting to live. If this is my furture, flashbacks and ghostly memories of all I have seem or experienced, I can not say I am going to make it long term.</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Logically I want to understand why the pain is sooooo bad and will it ever go away?</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I was disassociate for most of my life but the trauma in ICU brought the fear and feeling together for the first time in my life. Ever since them I can not stuff the pain. I lived with PTSD most of my life but know I can't seem to shake it. I want some one to be real honest with me. If my severity is at an 7 to 8 out of 10, with 10 being the worst, what can I expect long term?</span></span></div></div></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Thanks, Francesca</span></span></div></div></div></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-52075072984328350602011-05-17T23:28:00.002+02:002011-05-17T23:31:16.963+02:00what a small world it is.... Fra Filippo Lippi<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img alt="Fra Filippo Lippi" border="0" height="328" hspace="10" src="http://www.nndb.com/people/825/000084573/fra-filippo-lippi-1.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: right;" vspace="10" width="203" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 5px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 5px; line-height: 17px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">Autoportrait of Fra' Filippo Lippi</span></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.nndb.com/people/825/000084573/fra-filippo-lippi-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Fra Filippo Lippi</span></b></div><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>AKA: </b>Filippo Lippi</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Born:</b> c. 1406<br />
<b>Birthplace: </b> <a class="proflink" href="http://www.nndb.com/geo/908/000069701/" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Florence, Italy</a><br />
<b>Died: </b> <a class="proflink" href="http://www.nndb.com/lists/170/000106849/" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">10-Oct</a>-1469<br />
<b>Location of death: </b>Spoleto, Italy<br />
<b>Cause of death:</b> unspecified</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Gender:</b> Male<br />
<b>Religion:</b> <a class="proflink" href="http://www.nndb.com/lists/758/000094476/" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Roman Catholic</a><br />
<b>Race or Ethnicity:</b> White<br />
<b>Sexual orientation: </b>Straight<br />
<b>Occupation:</b> <a class="proflink" href="http://www.nndb.com/lists/331/000096043/" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">Painter</a></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Nationality:</b> Italy<br />
<b>Executive summary:</b> <i>Coronation of the Virgin</i></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>What a small world it is....</b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">In 2005 I studied art history at the Lorenzo Di Medici Art institute in Florance, Italy for 2 months. During our summer of classes, we the students had to choose 1 renaissance artist to study and recreate a new work of art that some how paralleled the story of this chosen artist from the past.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I chose Filippino Lippi the son of a Italian Monk, Friar, or Brother of the Roman Catholic Church. His father was Fra Filippo Lippi.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Today at my blogging headquarters, caff</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 19px;">è<b style="color: #2200c1;"> </b></span><b> </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">letterario, a tourist couple from Switzerland kept asking me where is the museum with the famous renaissance paintings. As any good ambassador would respond I said "whaaaat? We don't have that type of museum here..."</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">After pulling out my library card for 1 hour of free internet service on the boxes of shit we call computers here, I started my search... </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">What I found out is that the father of this artist child I had studied the life of, actually lived here in Spoleto, painted the famous frescoes at out Duomo and in fact died in Spoleto. Hum, I thought... time for me to do some researching...</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Then this evening I researched his father and found some mixed opinions of him floating out there in the world of internet information. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The rumors ranged from he was poisoned here and killed by Umbrian folks to he father several children and was a despicable Friar who was was endlessly committing sins. </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The indisputable story he is was an amazing artists who then taught he son to be an even more remarkable artist. He was a man full of passion for the love of one beautiful woman and strayed between his desires for her and the church.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Here below are the 2 mains stories that seem to take different directions on one man's life which ended here in Spoleto in 1469 about 542 years ago.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/09278a.htm">http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/09278a.htm</a></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The great artist lived in the continual embarrassments caused by his deplorable </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/10559a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">morals</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">. Never was anyone less fitted for </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/12748b.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">religious life</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">. His portraits show us a flat-nosed individual with a jesting, but vicious looking, thick-lipped, sensual face. To compel him to work Cosmo de' Medici was forced to lock him up, and even then the </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/11395a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">painter</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> escaped by a rope made of his sheets.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">His escapades threw him into financial difficulties from which he did not hesitate to extricate himself by </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/06135b.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">forgery</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/03187a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">Callistus III</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> was </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/11189a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">obliged</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> to deprive this unworthy </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/10487b.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">monk</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">, "who perpetrated many nefarious crimes", of a </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/02473c.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">benefice</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">. In 1452 the </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/03354a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">Carmelite</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> was requested by the commons of </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/12117a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">Prato</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> to </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/11395a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">paint</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> the choir of the </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/03438a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">cathedral</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">At length, despite his <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/05649a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">evil</a> reputation, Lippi succeeded in having himself appointed <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/03579b.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">chaplain</a> of a congregation of Augustinians. Here his misbehaviour was no less flagrant than elsewhere. It is significant and shows plainly what were the <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/07630a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">ideas</a> of the <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/12765b.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">Renaissance</a> that Lippi was not punished for his bad conduct. Glory or genius then constituted a soil of privilege and a warrant of impunity. Talent placed its possessor beyond and above the moral law. Not only did Cosmo di' Medicimake merry over what he called the "folly of the frater" (Letter of J. de Medici, 27 May, 1458), but <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/12126c.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">Pope Pius II</a> thought he could do no better than to release him from his <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/15511a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">vows</a> and permit him to marry. A son, <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/09277a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">Filippino Lippi</a>, had already been born to him. He afterwards had a daughter (1465). In the midst of these intrigues and disorders Filippo continued to <a href="http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/11395a.htm" style="text-decoration: none;">paint</a> his greatest works.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.nndb.com/people/825/000084573/">http://www.nndb.com/people/825/000084573/</a></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The close of Lippi's life was spent at Spoleto, where he had been commissioned to paint, for the apse of the cathedral, some scenes from the life of the </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.nndb.com/people/670/000030580/">Virgin Mary</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">. In the semi-dome of the apse is Christ crowning the Madonna, with angels, sibyls and prophets. This series, which is not wholly equal to the one at Prato, was completed by </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.nndb.com/people/499/000097208/">Fra Diamante</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> after Lippi's death. That Lippi died in Spoleto, on or about the 8th of October 1469, is an undoubted fact; the mode of his death is again a matter of dispute. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">It has been said that the pope granted Lippi a dispensation for marrying Lucrezia, but that, before the permission arrived he had been poisoned by the indignant relatives either of Lucrezia herself, or of some lady who had replaced her in the inconstant painter's affections. This is now generally regarded as a fable and indeed a vendetta upon a man aged sixty-three for a seduction committed at the already mature age of fifty-two seems hardly plausible. Fra Filippo lies buried in Spoleto, with a monument erected to him by </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.nndb.com/people/179/000092900/">Lorenzo de Medici</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">; he had always been zealously patronized by the Medici family, beginning with Cosimo, Pater Patriae. </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Francesco di Pesello (called Pesellino) and </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.nndb.com/people/734/000084482/">Sandro Botticelli</a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> were among his most distinguished pupils.</span></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-50983138310768224862011-05-16T00:46:00.000+02:002011-05-16T00:46:21.771+02:00my eat, drink & have fun historical center Spoleto hang outs<span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; border-collapse: collapse; line-height: 11px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 13px;"><em style="font-style: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 0px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 0px; border-collapse: separate; line-height: 24px;"></span></em></span></span><br />
<h3 style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-style: italic; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><em style="font-style: normal;"></em></div></h3><h3 style="display: inline !important; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large; font-style: italic; line-height: 20px; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="display: inline !important; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div></span><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><div style="font-family: Schoolbell; line-height: normal; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">Caffè letterario - </span></b><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell;">VIA BRIGNONE 14</span></b></span></div><div style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: x-large; font-style: italic; font-weight: bold; line-height: normal; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; line-height: 19px;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWvqXYMm-XqlT8M3QumTL_w6BXPrh2EOUGzjtcqKvkMOndlWNQA5P36Kw679RpBdeMWOI9uMGCOeBLTWDx6oXrhEvabqvc_cpGpIPdsftAd0egS40-9_15YHdLsl_RsHpZy-mjB1D6VOg/s1600/Cafe+letterario.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="display: inline !important; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWvqXYMm-XqlT8M3QumTL_w6BXPrh2EOUGzjtcqKvkMOndlWNQA5P36Kw679RpBdeMWOI9uMGCOeBLTWDx6oXrhEvabqvc_cpGpIPdsftAd0egS40-9_15YHdLsl_RsHpZy-mjB1D6VOg/s400/Cafe+letterario.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></div></div><span style="color: black; font-size: large; font-style: italic; line-height: 20px; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><div style="text-align: left;"><em style="font-style: normal;"></em><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="display: inline !important; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;"><em style="font-style: normal;"><em style="font-style: normal;"></em></em></div><h3 style="display: inline !important; line-height: 20px; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><em style="font-style: normal;"><em style="font-style: normal;"><em style="font-style: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="display: inline !important; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="display: inline !important; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;"><span style="color: black;"><em style="font-style: normal;"></em></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="display: inline !important; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt;"><em style="font-style: normal;"></em></div></span></em></em></em></h3></div></span><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 19px; text-transform: uppercase;"><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;">BAR PREMIATA PASTICCERIA TEBRO - </span></b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;">VIA MINERVIO, 1</span></span></div></span></div></h3><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvcn96BClEGmADqjxJ_SDs8d9HfQiM7XULRmuVm7WA9pv6mzJpYEA0s16SknMJDh6x9Oj1hYfXm6S-M_72vQlfMc3MZrIOsb8Dsw72vzXqqaW9MEpiF_UYOae2J6uh8rD6zCB4mZWztis/s1600/tebro.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="display: inline !important; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="295" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvcn96BClEGmADqjxJ_SDs8d9HfQiM7XULRmuVm7WA9pv6mzJpYEA0s16SknMJDh6x9Oj1hYfXm6S-M_72vQlfMc3MZrIOsb8Dsw72vzXqqaW9MEpiF_UYOae2J6uh8rD6zCB4mZWztis/s400/tebro.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: left;"><div class="" style="clear: both; font-style: italic; line-height: normal; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: bold;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"></span></span></b></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><b><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><br />
</span></b></b></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><b><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><span style="color: blue;"><a href="http://www.ristoranteosteriavecchiocamino.com/">OSTERIA VECCHIO CAMINO</a> - </span></span></b></b><b><b><span class="Apple-style-span"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;">VIA POSTERNA, 21<i> </i></span></span></b></b></span></span></span></b></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilOTGAdSiokr-4x36_AuEBOIIxCSi6cfSOWD5ZWyDAlTMJAdaMX85Zm9autoEoK45qAOYU258oErrgr8_nNzqi4VDzS5045FuAkxQdFICbwx_bUotMZfsxD_fE7dyoyBs53DsRoy2Hhhk/s1600/camino.png" imageanchor="1" style="display: inline !important; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilOTGAdSiokr-4x36_AuEBOIIxCSi6cfSOWD5ZWyDAlTMJAdaMX85Zm9autoEoK45qAOYU258oErrgr8_nNzqi4VDzS5045FuAkxQdFICbwx_bUotMZfsxD_fE7dyoyBs53DsRoy2Hhhk/s400/camino.png" width="400" /></a></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><b><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><br />
</span></b></b></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal; font-weight: bold;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span">TAVERNA LA LANTERNA - </span></span></b></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;">VIA DELLA TRATTORIA, 6</span></b></span></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span"><div style="font-style: italic; line-height: normal; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"></div></span></div><h3 style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: bold; line-height: normal;"><div style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal; text-align: left;"><div style="display: inline !important; font-weight: normal; text-align: left;"><b><span style="font-style: normal;"><span style="font-style: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: bold; line-height: normal;"><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="display: inline !important; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 1.5pt; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: center;"><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"></span></div></span></span></span></b></div></div></span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsAdgKATBTTpBtJ0k5mvvnFWBwJ9BMUXfnb_nkFjhJq4ypxdGOzcaXURFPaBGpRdTXbMzmQOSGz_bKmOWFnEvZzQROQ3AN1g79O7KAf8Kken6Vy43Qsyjukr_cv63fngTL3_LORrqcZJo/s1600/taverna+la+laterna+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsAdgKATBTTpBtJ0k5mvvnFWBwJ9BMUXfnb_nkFjhJq4ypxdGOzcaXURFPaBGpRdTXbMzmQOSGz_bKmOWFnEvZzQROQ3AN1g79O7KAf8Kken6Vy43Qsyjukr_cv63fngTL3_LORrqcZJo/s400/taverna+la+laterna+2.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><br />
</span></b></span></span></span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;">CAFFE' DEGLI ARTISTI - </span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-style: normal;">PIAZZA DEL MERCATO, 32</span></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-style: italic; line-height: 20px; text-transform: uppercase;"><img border="0" height="222" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK95Nl5-LmmCDEAoOwgYO0gdlKp11SC6OIyR6-lK-ec6GeCq0ctCcV4qMrGS4eMh-9PH_aed8PfnO8brSCxDZavC-8KWAQrg4Qa0OQobJXqFsnuryyySVsef015HmYGK-LadYwjgj-Puw/s400/bar+artisti.jpg" width="400" /></span></div></div></h3><h3 style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span"><h3 style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span"><div style="font-style: italic; line-height: 20px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: normal; line-height: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; text-transform: uppercase;"><a href="http://draft.blogger.com/goog_1655302431"><b><span style="color: blue; font-family: Schoolbell;">RISTORANTE </span></b></a></span><b><span style="color: black; font-family: Schoolbell; text-transform: uppercase;"><span style="color: blue;"><a href="http://www.ristorantetrefontane.it/cucina.php">PIZZERIA TRE FONTANE</a> - </span></span></b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-style: normal; line-height: normal;">VIA BENEDETTO EGIO, 1</span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: normal;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggdcOdD8ikfwJ1RRVEajgqB8WMgvEhQpikkob5Enp1VWvEuI8K2AqLkiMCf8x60zDoJEMKkmyaqJi1KbRavG7_-QfQgN4dJUsFq3NlDq5TTvGNJ0KC8A1P1yxEJrzNo2Jlwm9BSjVFU60/s1600/trefontane-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="display: inline !important; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-style: italic; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggdcOdD8ikfwJ1RRVEajgqB8WMgvEhQpikkob5Enp1VWvEuI8K2AqLkiMCf8x60zDoJEMKkmyaqJi1KbRavG7_-QfQgN4dJUsFq3NlDq5TTvGNJ0KC8A1P1yxEJrzNo2Jlwm9BSjVFU60/s400/trefontane-2.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></span></div></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><div style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-style: italic;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic;"><em style="font-style: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"></span></em></span></div></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-style: italic; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-decoration: none; text-transform: uppercase;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="display: inline !important; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"></div></span><br />
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</span></span></span></div></div></h3></span></span></span></h3></span></h3>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-3635124218540561812011-05-15T20:38:00.002+02:002011-05-15T20:39:53.715+02:00my 9 cat lives -poetry look back how I know death<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: justify;"><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><b>HOW I KNOW DEATH</b></span><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> </span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 17px;">Bike/car accident Classmate from elementary school</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Suicide Fourth grade teacher across the hall<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Bike/car accident David Berlow, middle school class mate<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Illness Aunt Sadie, First open casket funeral<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Euthanized, old age Crackerjacks, my Irish setter<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Sleeping My loved Grandmother<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Car accident Shaun, our Siamese cat<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Cancer My Grandfather<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Murder Young pregnant homeless woman, sheet pulled over<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Murder Man being taped off by police<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Car accident One airborne car flies into windshield of couple<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Cancer My beloved mother<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Cancer Peter Lapcheskie, business friend<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Murder Vicky Diamond, friend from high school<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Cancer My father<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Pedestrian/car accident Young man lying in the street I swerved to not hit<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Cancer Janet Greene, my friend<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Car accident Princess Diana<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Suicide Ginny Jurgens, client and friend<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Francesca <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 13pt; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">November 12, 1997<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-64946142397187224332011-05-15T20:29:00.001+02:002011-05-15T20:30:13.904+02:00my 9 cat lives - poetry look back at the way we were<div class="MsoTitle" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>Our Relationship<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoTitle" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoTitle" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The way we are…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoSubtitle" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The way we were…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The way we have always been…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The way we dreamed we could have been…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The life we know…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The life we live…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The life we lost we wanted most…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The life we resent we know we live…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways we gave…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways we took…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways we hurt inside…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways we hurt each other…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The dreams we aborted…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The dreams that disappeared…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The dreams we’ve given up on…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>Are the nightmares of resentments that we share… <o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways I blame you…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways you blame me…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways we hold no hope…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>Are the ways we share despair…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><b>The ways we lost what we wanted most…<o:p></o:p></b></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"></span></o:p></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">Francesca Owens </span></b></div><h1><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">August 30, 2001</span><o:p></o:p></span></h1>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-46961031890573367202011-05-15T20:24:00.000+02:002011-05-15T20:24:45.317+02:00my 9 cat lives - poetry look back at REALITY<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">THE REALITY</span><!--[if supportFields]><span style='font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:
10.0pt;font-family:Schoolbell;letter-spacing:-.15pt'><span style='mso-element:
field-begin'></span>PRIVATE </span><![endif]--><!--[if supportFields]><span
style='font-size:12.0pt;mso-bidi-font-size:10.0pt;font-family:Schoolbell;
letter-spacing:-.15pt'><span style='mso-element:field-end'></span></span><![endif]--><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">The cries of adulthood: not normal, damaged, desperate, less than perfect, seasonally depressed, hopeless, lonely, fearful, worried, afraid, needing to escape, abandoned, desiring to be rescued, unlovable, too sensitive, unrealistic and unforgiving self standards for physical beauty, not valuable, carrying lies of sole blame and fault.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">The honesty of adulthood: intelligent, attractive, creative, accomplished, empathetic, communicative, educated, calculated risk taker, passionate, out going, vivacious, blessed, deep, talented, caring, giving, go-getter, intimate, fun, lovable, appreciative of life. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">The fantasy of childhood: deny, bargain, fantasize, believe and rebel.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>"It's my fault..., otherwise he would of...", "If I..., then it wouldn't of happened", "I will escape to... where it is beautiful and perfect", "Please promise you won't drink tonight, my friend is sleeping over", "When I grow up, no one will ever do this to me again".<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">The truth of childhood: I was not too sensitive; in contrast I was very perceptive at a young age seeing this horrid home life for what it was. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I forced to loose my opinions, thoughts, feelings, beliefs and perceptions.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Brainwashed then validated to believe it was me who saw this picture wrong.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nothing I could do, neither right or wrong could/would change his behavior nor make me ever responsible for this hopelessness. I'd lie awake at night in the dark listening to the fights, no wonder I am afraid of the dark and fearful of much.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I lived broken promises day after year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Rewriting my world through my Barbie doll being rescued by her prince, wonder why I'm attracted to this reality in relationships?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Separate and numb from my feelings and body; a valued survival tool used frequently later life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My mother's strength in words to not repeat this life became etched in my brain like the wall of china.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The sights of seeing and living my childhood lended itself to an easier path to follow.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Enmeshment with my mothers was her silent way of validating my accurate perception of this sick reality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was her friend listening to her plans of escape.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Too emotionally weak to leave the relationship, she chose self-illness and quietly abandoned the family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Too young, too enmeshed... I hurt to understand.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">The reality of adulthood; now why is it I wonder where these... periodic, desperate, reoccurring feelings of hopelessness come from?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Laced with harsh self-criticism, self-invalidation and doubt of my own intuition and ability to exercise good judgement?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wonder where and why?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don't think so!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I break down these voices and share with them the true reality.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remind myself when they forget... that's right, I am not normal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I'm extra-ordinary, phenomenal, talented, polished, brilliant, luminous, beautiful and blessed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am blessed with the wisdom to peel back my scarred layers. To cleanse these lifelong wounds. To nurture and repair the damage, to parent and support this growth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To commit to experiencing this found childlike innocence and self-love, the innocence that was taken away and the self-love that was never taught.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I now understand.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I see my reality clearly.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Francesca<span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">April 6, 1997</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-80484701149149986362011-05-15T20:18:00.001+02:002011-05-15T20:25:28.379+02:00my 9 cat lives - poetry look back of Rue Cler<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;"><b>RUE CLER</b></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large;">Delight your senses, palette and soul at Rue Cler</span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">wander down a cobblestone community laced<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">with iron work balconies and grand antique shutters above,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">colored awnings receive you as you meander through its local commerce<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">an experience to nourish the spirit... and charm the taste buds of<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">every fortuitous visitor,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">where miniature dogs, especially Yorkshire terriers are the pet of preference<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">and if chance would have it, being awakened to a morning "Bonjour" yelled across the market from a newfound American friend,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">where street performers play Persians tunes live by accordion and<o:p></o:p></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">merchants offer delights of tastes, each truly connoisseurs of their trade!<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"> What indulgence will be your affair? What delicacy will fancy your excursion?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: center 3.25in; text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Tarte shop apple, raspberry, custard, chocolat, citron, or mandarin<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Fleur store buckets and baskets of brilliant flowers, what’s your favorite?<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Crepe stand ham, egg & cheese, fruit & sugar, nutella, pineapple or cream<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Vin shop red or white, choose from the wicker baskets out front<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Confiserris over 100 different chocolat, pralines & candy to choose from<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Boucher shop poultry, lyons hanging, pork chops as big as you hand,<o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Boulangerie fresh baguettes, quiche or fluffy cream and ham sandwiches <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Fruits de mer fish on ice, shellfish, lobster, crabs, octopus, <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Produit ripe tender vibrant colored berries, peaches, tomamoes <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Fromage brie, gruyere, neufchatel, <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Corner Cafe expresso and a flaky choclat croissant standing at the bar <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-hyphenate: none; tab-stops: -.5in;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: large; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;">Francesca <o:p></o:p></span></div><h2><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">July, 1997</span><o:p></o:p></span></h2>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-49366637718881141942011-05-15T20:17:00.003+02:002011-05-15T20:19:37.779+02:00my 9 cat lives - poetry look back at a legacy<div class="MsoTitle"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">RICH OF THE SOUL<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoBodyText"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I feel like the lucky one, living life to the fullest. I look around and see others who let their life pass them by. One day their life closes in on them and they never even catch what could have been. I feel so alive, I feel so passionate about the blessings in my life and the simple events of my days. I look at some of our great artists and writers living overseas. I picture them at cafes in Europe and I feel the passion and wisdom in their life. I understand this intimacy and peace. I see the richness of their experiences. I see myself living life, this life, my life. I see my difference from all others around me, who are caught up in the incidentals. Little do they realize that these things which they believe to be life are truly incidentals. Focusing on these incidents blocks their ability to see life clearly. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I wonder where I am on this growth line. How much more I need to grow and live. I think about making a difference in other’s lives, possibly leaving a legacy, pretty big thoughts for someone as simple as me. I think about what will be my mark on society? Will it be with writing or will it be with deeds? Will it be with my character of style or just a mark on family and the ones I love so dear? <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">I know I’m different. I know my thoughts and feelings are so out of line with the norm. I used to feel like the “misfit” but now feel I’ve found what most others never find or even know exists. So once again I come to a place where I say thank you, thank you for allowing me to be a chosen one, privileged to carry the inner light. I walk my days with a happiness that shines from with in. I open my eyes and let my light shine out in each smile and glance, and sparkle in my eyes. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Francesca<o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">January 10, 1999</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-86301791542945327442011-05-15T20:05:00.002+02:002011-05-15T20:40:53.732+02:00my 9 cat lives - poetry look back on gifts<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.25pt;">Blessings I've received from ...</span><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.25pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"> </span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.25pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">"The gift of pain"<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.25pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to be honest with myself<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to be empathetic with all others<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to confront my fears and let them go<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to develop rich character in who I am<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to allow myself to feel vulnerable, genuine, intimate,<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">innocent and child-like feelings<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to give myself permission to miss and always love my<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">loved ones, that are now gone<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to gain identity, strength and purpose from life's tribulations<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to know I will survive, live, heal, and go forward to enjoy<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">to have learned to truly love<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.2pt;"><o:p> </o:p></span> </span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; letter-spacing: -0.15pt;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">Francesca Owens<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div><h1 align="left" style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;">December 1996</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 31px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></h1>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-47198380174867715042011-05-15T19:56:00.000+02:002011-05-15T19:56:00.670+02:00my first tiger painting & there after<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikxpO118AvBLGpQRW7P91cTpdrKZPV2EDPKDzCAb9K9wdu1tMQOObx1IUXCYt__WdfQW9yUbTYTgbFp8i_yuOJ-GQiuIDcvOYId8QB-1wp_GDP3ZrCbONid3DypiIQNPDT84m1hJuWbn0/s1600/tiger+wc.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikxpO118AvBLGpQRW7P91cTpdrKZPV2EDPKDzCAb9K9wdu1tMQOObx1IUXCYt__WdfQW9yUbTYTgbFp8i_yuOJ-GQiuIDcvOYId8QB-1wp_GDP3ZrCbONid3DypiIQNPDT84m1hJuWbn0/s400/tiger+wc.jpg" width="322" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;"><b>Don't laugh but he was my first attempt at <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b><div style="display: inline !important; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 13px; font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;"><b>a tiger <br />
Feb 2004, yes that's right</b></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b><div style="display: inline !important; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 13px; font-weight: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;"><b> </b></span></span></div></b></span></div></b></span></b></span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaThIz1P0BAIWucaby0YxJqJyNXZ19rQDXGBzWqIZ3MRDJIQjL9dsouDFEQh4KI9CoCU1DJtk8KeaOqQvn0OWfU8sMgN5gedn379C_ksYhEmFrMCSYEnI_KJJ2hBY2F0m_ENaIKnY5o-Q/s1600/1210_Tiger_Tri_Tic_1_Graphite.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaThIz1P0BAIWucaby0YxJqJyNXZ19rQDXGBzWqIZ3MRDJIQjL9dsouDFEQh4KI9CoCU1DJtk8KeaOqQvn0OWfU8sMgN5gedn379C_ksYhEmFrMCSYEnI_KJJ2hBY2F0m_ENaIKnY5o-Q/s400/1210_Tiger_Tri_Tic_1_Graphite.JPG" width="396" /></a></td></tr>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0hIwlZVSzcNqUj2-bUroFaCxJSqCBW6D-zPzhkBId8mvd3cpOYQ2dA9h1aR-tNC98kSa7EuNepKxU13qie7-UFYIWyhcXL4LFJxbggWngkov9bL8mkQtl73O39MDa9BTBHnSKUCdFgLM/s1600/FrancescaFarming.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="270" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0hIwlZVSzcNqUj2-bUroFaCxJSqCBW6D-zPzhkBId8mvd3cpOYQ2dA9h1aR-tNC98kSa7EuNepKxU13qie7-UFYIWyhcXL4LFJxbggWngkov9bL8mkQtl73O39MDa9BTBHnSKUCdFgLM/s400/FrancescaFarming.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqiNvQ2yLZPBzs9y996cU8LG7TSJHGQr1ruuI74V2UbAWWTNW0Lr6ysogawMrbA3Nw19DmVwojgJcfJmS_amhZ8iswqM7tGxEV-6WaiJLB0qskLjy9K9nS_nQL8GRvg8FzEl1w0WiJYAA/s1600/no+wild+in+wild.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="270" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqiNvQ2yLZPBzs9y996cU8LG7TSJHGQr1ruuI74V2UbAWWTNW0Lr6ysogawMrbA3Nw19DmVwojgJcfJmS_amhZ8iswqM7tGxEV-6WaiJLB0qskLjy9K9nS_nQL8GRvg8FzEl1w0WiJYAA/s400/no+wild+in+wild.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
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</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-40598293275719694642011-05-15T18:19:00.003+02:002011-05-15T18:50:11.604+02:00nano second escape OCT 07: Resignation 9 years of Colorado Public Service<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisdXR37a8Tos3Zs0d3hJdsdlmOsR9NXCWoQYptMUv6yqYostbT3DxtT6N9zSsh7-LMtjneppAgVlGIC9MjjsUzY1-k1_9picsfUG2eLer27gft4BkiQTXt7MAq9aiAvQ2ocwvqNQruvQI/s1600/award.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisdXR37a8Tos3Zs0d3hJdsdlmOsR9NXCWoQYptMUv6yqYostbT3DxtT6N9zSsh7-LMtjneppAgVlGIC9MjjsUzY1-k1_9picsfUG2eLer27gft4BkiQTXt7MAq9aiAvQ2ocwvqNQruvQI/s400/award.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">Award Ceremony Grant Ranch nature Park & Learning Gardens</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlH4szfUEJ2xITlyXFozX7vkaTR6ZTrDUf3PEOTmQwdjr3AzVja_C2DU2YGoJdZuKHb4QuQZWqh2FkVQsmAS0lB8pDPZIg5o1MkFWKeKVkaKUue1t_ly82wh1ngKJVSVbdp3uN9jNuFPA/s1600/1groundbreak.%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="263" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlH4szfUEJ2xITlyXFozX7vkaTR6ZTrDUf3PEOTmQwdjr3AzVja_C2DU2YGoJdZuKHb4QuQZWqh2FkVQsmAS0lB8pDPZIg5o1MkFWKeKVkaKUue1t_ly82wh1ngKJVSVbdp3uN9jNuFPA/s400/1groundbreak.%25281%2529.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">Ground Breaking Ceremony</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQOY2-Bh7FsibBBCXGXwJLmSuj5p2kot2Ax0WpgFacNX-oJCNujfbohprtvR5L4lRG6B6XBFn3oF5bSyy0-bJNUGyiKzw76WN_UEBImrrxAXxfu8ZCq8gOacMazit_HGNjRAaLlzF49pc/s1600/gocograde.%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="294" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQOY2-Bh7FsibBBCXGXwJLmSuj5p2kot2Ax0WpgFacNX-oJCNujfbohprtvR5L4lRG6B6XBFn3oF5bSyy0-bJNUGyiKzw76WN_UEBImrrxAXxfu8ZCq8gOacMazit_HGNjRAaLlzF49pc/s400/gocograde.%25281%2529.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">2nd highest ranking GOCO Grant for $90,000</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4rDL9oyOyOI-j2sEcvrlxCWzWNVSRfiiJ-S7nQxnj7dL9UhqaZFeRj2967qpGKbOONWOhsITbHB3t9_vGcCKOzHrzhJPsxLs46TD9VQItFOiUMDANTzfc3r_UxXQDKtURGKIm_YZ1nuM/s1600/2herons.%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4rDL9oyOyOI-j2sEcvrlxCWzWNVSRfiiJ-S7nQxnj7dL9UhqaZFeRj2967qpGKbOONWOhsITbHB3t9_vGcCKOzHrzhJPsxLs46TD9VQItFOiUMDANTzfc3r_UxXQDKtURGKIm_YZ1nuM/s400/2herons.%25281%2529.jpg" width="330" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Privileged guest of honor, our <br />
seasonal blue herons</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><blockquote style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">OCTOBER 30, 2007 was my departure </span></b></blockquote><blockquote style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">flight to Italy...</span></b></blockquote><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Date: </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Wed, 24 Oct 2007 17:01:28 -0600</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>From: </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"Francesca Owens" <francescaod@usa.net></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>To: </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"David Peak" <David.Peak@cliftoncpa.com></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Subject: </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Resignation Letter</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dear Dave,</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Please include this with the board's next packet. I am resigning as of this</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">November 2007 meeting. It has been a great nine/ten years of service to this</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">wonderful community. It taught me to pursue my life's dreams with passion. I</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">gained much wisdom and courage to really go after all that is possible in</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">one's life.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The time since the open heart surgery and multitude of post surgery</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">complications has left me short on energy. It is now time for me to pursue</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">solely my current passions and reduce the work load I have been carrying as I</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">can no longer do it all.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Thank you, Francesca Owens</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-90439319723738029582011-05-15T15:51:00.079+02:002011-05-18T01:11:35.309+02:00dr.OCHBERG'S response to a columbine survivor's (me) questions march 2008<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ1st_evxgFN4sYL0PdEj-vFrszHaPexPbepLSl7UX0IpSMBbx8uEdM8nTfQgNzVSVEKP2IX_4VxcgXfDg5T53Mizcn9AlGwPkGE7OXv_dOkt3NXM6TWcVBE2H4bH2lozqzVM38q0JxA0/s400/morning+aftre+night+terrors+3.JPG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">I fought all night to save the 13 Columbine victims from<br />
the 2 perpetrators, they all lived but when I woke up,<br />
this is what I looked like...</span></td></tr>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOWDysQodV2b4mSW4azMLE8Yz0DY2rvSmwegjeKGwwT_H4_FZrE-zjeTvE3p2cSOENJgEVJG_LgBzKVxm9gQkvHrTenaBNthyphenhyphenB-D9EzddayUGEechfefs3A3VzSRu7kMBp37_Iq5fLA6E/s400/mroning+after+night+terrors+2.JPG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">When night terrors arrive a C-PTSD sufferer will relive the violence with force while sleeping. We fight with our bodies and hands swinging and scratching to fighting off the perpetrators</span></td></tr>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjc9SUjUKtbPrMAwjSMPiYAQk3rwOehfgKYhPaghg9qnCI5hQyfPVuS3ZRXf03w-nBG6E2Ggi0N64cNMfEIx-mPCcNy57aaqQg8kcjhgotiZC2Z3k902GrSKqwW1OVbneqpCIN5C6llpKM/s1600/morning+after+night+terrors+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjc9SUjUKtbPrMAwjSMPiYAQk3rwOehfgKYhPaghg9qnCI5hQyfPVuS3ZRXf03w-nBG6E2Ggi0N64cNMfEIx-mPCcNy57aaqQg8kcjhgotiZC2Z3k902GrSKqwW1OVbneqpCIN5C6llpKM/s400/morning+after+night+terrors+1.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">In the very last night terror of this 18 month period, I in the dream managed to save the life of my girlfriend's killed daughter but this last time I had to give my life up to have her escape.</span></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj53fAO40Lh6iyYha1vqG_qU4iO0bMqpw5HRAm-1kQSidtcjnHK8FyubYSM1myhvkN4bZD6ay9o0UjyAghd_oOy-A7nfHOoZ0nwTvjXhxFQklZjH1SisD3wojVlnDkfraR_E4ZWQ4gq4b0/s400/mornign+after+nigth+terrors+4.JPG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: small;">This story is dedicated to Anglea Fite</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj53fAO40Lh6iyYha1vqG_qU4iO0bMqpw5HRAm-1kQSidtcjnHK8FyubYSM1myhvkN4bZD6ay9o0UjyAghd_oOy-A7nfHOoZ0nwTvjXhxFQklZjH1SisD3wojVlnDkfraR_E4ZWQ4gq4b0/s1600/mornign+after+nigth+terrors+4.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj53fAO40Lh6iyYha1vqG_qU4iO0bMqpw5HRAm-1kQSidtcjnHK8FyubYSM1myhvkN4bZD6ay9o0UjyAghd_oOy-A7nfHOoZ0nwTvjXhxFQklZjH1SisD3wojVlnDkfraR_E4ZWQ4gq4b0/s1600/mornign+after+nigth+terrors+4.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Late in October 2007 I visited my then stock brokerage firm to wrap up loose ends before running to Italy to take cover. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I felt the need to talk with the office manager about what had been happening with body memory flashbacks and </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">telling their stories of arriving on violent new deaths,my office manager opened up and shared her daughter's finally 24 hours of life. Her daughter was </span><a href="http://extras.denverpost.com/news/ax0711c.htm" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: x-large;">Angela Fite</a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">. </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I arrived in Italy October 31, 2007 and little did I know what was going to be the next six months of my life. The finally dream was of Angela. In my dream she lived. I forced her out the door and I turned and gave my life in order to slow him down from getting her. I told her to run, run go, let him have me.</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">As I lodged my body between the door stopping him, I turned and the axe was coming down on me. I woke up swinging my arms and screaming and was confused. This was April 1, 2008 but it took </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">2 months later when back in Colorado and driving up to the office, that this dream re-appeared in my eyes. I sat paralyzed in my car remembering who I had saved this night in my dreams.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">It took till October 2008 before I could write her mother, my friend and tell her. Before then i was too afraid to do so. So this is just 1 example of the information arriving October 2007 and it haunted me continuously for 1 year till I saved her.</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Angela's dream was the worst and the last of this 18 month nightmares. Finally my mind felt light and clean enough to be freed of any responsibility for these events I had nothing to do with.</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">----- Original Message ------ </span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f;"></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>Received: </b></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Mon, 17 Mar 2008 12:31:27 PM MDT</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b>From: </b>JoyceB3955@aol.com</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b></b></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b>To: </b>francescaod@usa.net</span></b></span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b></b></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><b>Subject: </b>Re: a columbine survivor...I have a few questions </span></b></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dear Francesca:</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This is Joyce from Gift From Within. I sent your email to Dr. Ochberg and he responded using our Q&A format. What I mean by that statement is that at times we receive very thoughtful questions that other people have asked even though the event and wording are different. Frank believes the issues you raise are well stated and would be useful to other people who visit our website. see</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.giftfromwithin.org/html/qna.html" id="usa-link" style="color: #000099; outline-color: initial; outline-style: none; outline-width: initial; text-decoration: underline;" target="_blank">http://www.giftfromwithin.org/html/qna.html</a> </span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">After reading his answers perhaps you will allow me to publish this on our Q&A page and we can take out together references which will give you anonymity, and us protection i.e. like not referring to Unum a specific insurance company in a public format. Let me know which references you think we should hide. Warm regards, Joyce</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dear Joyce,</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Ms. O. writes a compelling email, describing several profound traumatic events, including direct exposure to an infamous high school massacre (while caring for many elementary school children) and, approximately six years later, open heart surgery, and insurance company problems. Ms. O does not give details of other life traumas, but says there were many, that the pain is still powerful and debilitating, and that relocation to a beautiful part of Italy and the presence of an excellent therapist is helpful, but not enough. Dissociation (an altered state of consciousness that serves as a defense against overwhelming anxiety) once seemed to lessen the pain of searing memory. Meditation helps to a limited extent. There are good days. But bad days are so bad that, on those days, life seems not worth living. Ms. O does not ask for remedy, but rather for an honest prognosis. "What can I expect long term?," she asks of us.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">First, thank you Ms. O for writing and for the obvious inspiration and care you have given others. You are an artist and you have guided young people. Artists often distill human experience, seeing and feeling the essence of reality, suffering when others suffer. Having an eye for beauty may not balance the experience of traumatic and tragic loss. Finding grace and meaning in nature may not erase the memory of senseless harm to an innocent adolescent. But your artistic ability is worth emphasizing. Several of my patients with complex PTSD are artists or writers or reporters. They do see into the heart of things. That talent is a blessing and a curse. Try to remember the fact that it is a gift; try to use that gift; try to identify with others who used such gifts to enlighten the rest of us. CBT - cognitive behavioral therapy- works in a simple way. When the bad days and the bad feelings are too much with us, we learn to think about the talent we have and to respect it. We may not be able to use it during a period of fear, grief or depression. But we need to know it is there and it will be there to be used when the crisis passes.</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This is different from trying to be numb or from longing for respite from memory. This is saying to oneself, "I am an artist. I am more sensitive. Sensitivity is painful, but useful. Others have this condition and I respect them for it."</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The fact that your insurance company (and other bureaucracies) are oblivious to your condition and appear to care more about their bottom line than your legal right to just compensation is familiar to me -and to others with complex PTSD. Jonathan Shay, in his profound book, "Achilles in Vietnam," notes that since ancient times, the traumatically injured have suffered more from injustice that from horrifying wounds. Whether the source of betrayal is King Agamemnon's greed or an insensitive insurance adjustor, we are profoundly affected by the loss of honor, justice and humanity. My team, writing the diagnosis PTSD, had no language to capture this philosophical symptom -a loss of a sense of meaning. But anyone who works with complex PTSD knows to look for that ancient wound, to give voice to it, and in so doing, to guide a person toward recovery of dignity and worth.</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Your relocation from America to Italy speaks to this wound. It is not unusual to seek a different home when home has harbored trauma and injustice.</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">And now to the question at hand. Can this complex injury in a sensitive person be tolerated? Can the long term prognosis include substantial recovery? </span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I believe it can. I have seen it happen in cases that included the murder of ones children and the destruction of ones platoon due to incompetence of leadership. It never happens easily. Some denial of reality is often part of the path to tolerance. Shakespeare's line in Lear was not unreal: "As flies to wanton boys are we to the gods; they kill us for their sport." But reality is as beautiful as it is ugly and meaningless. The capacity to experience that beauty comes through deliberate acts of seeing and knowing. You cannot avoid seeing the tragic, whether it is the past, present or future. But you can learn to see the sources of hope and love. That does come back and it does prevail, despite cruelty and incompetence and indifference, which are the sources of complex PTSD.</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Recovery is never absolute. We do not reach a life that is free of sadness. But the sharp pain of traumatic memory does reduce in amplitude and surprise. You may need to work with a specialist who uses the counting method or EMDR or some form of re-exposure, if that has not yet been part of your therapy. You may need to work with someone who uses CBT as I suggest above, tailoring this CBT to your unique set of skills and losses. A good therapist is always wise and supportive, but a specialist may be needed to help deal with debilitating aspects of complex PTSD. With time and distance, new sources of fulfillment and meaning should emerge. One can't escape the past without a present and future that holds promise. </span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">There is every reason to believe that you will find those sources of fulfillment, and can say to yourself:</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"I may never forget, but I need not constantly remember." Shakespeare didn't write that line. I did. And I based it on many, many life stories.</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br class="webkit-block-placeholder" /></span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">My very best to you, Ms. O.</span></span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #004080; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Dear Joyce,</span></span></div></div></div><table style="border-collapse: collapse; color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Subject:</span></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">a columbine survivor...I have a few questions </span></div></div></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"></div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Date:</span></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">02:28 PM MDT, 03/16/08</span></div></div></div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">From:</span></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><form style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">"Francesca Owens" <francescaod@usa.net></span></div></div></div></form></td></tr>
<tr><td class="title" style="font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px; text-align: right;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">To:</span></div></div></div></td><td style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 3px; padding-right: 3px; padding-top: 0px;" valign="top"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><JoyceB3955@aol.com></span></div></div></div><div><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div></div></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I googled Columbine PTSD to see if I could find any one else suffering from PTSD. I found your and Dr. Frank Ochberg's Q & A. My name is Francesca Owens and former Littleton, Colorado resident. Currently I am living in Umbria Italy because I can't handle the USA any more.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">April 19th, 1999 three parents, 2 elementary school teachers and 60 6th graders went on a field trip. We walked from Leawood Elementary school through Columbine High School grounds to the Columbine Public Library. We were the first responders after the event. The high school students fled the school running to the closest open building, us.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">The librarians, three parents and two teachers were the beginning of the command post. The police showed up with military, firefighters and then media. We supported the police the whole day until they allowed us parents to leave at about 6:00 p.m. One of the mothers and I with our kids walked on the school grounds that day after the event not being current on the news as we only saw from within our windows what was going on. It wasn't till we got home that we saw the full story on the news ands that there were bombs in the field we walked across after the event.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I am suffering from severe complex ptsd and can barely handle it any more. I have a wonderful therapist here. I am currently out on disability with a private policy from Unum insurance company. They do not believe me and contact with them is just an extension of abuse for me, though maybe I am not in reality.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I have a life long list of trauma and was a high profile functioning person in society till I had open heart surgery a 1 1/2 ago at 44 yoa. New trauma in ICU came back 9 months later in horrible flashbacks.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I know therapy is a must. I have done some PTSD. I do some meditation. I am an artist, and ex stock broker now. I search the Internet endlessly looking for that magic pill for fix this all.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">When the pain starts, I want out. Good days are good and some can be great. Though bad days are horrible and horrible days are on the edge of not wanting to live. If this is my furture, flashbacks and ghostly memories of all I have seem or experienced, I can not say I am going to make it long term.</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Logically I want to understand why the pain is sooooo bad and will it ever go away?</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I was disassociate for most of my life but the trauma in ICU brought the fear and feeling together for the first time in my life. Ever since them I can not stuff the pain. I lived with PTSD most of my life but know I can't seem to shake it. I want some one to be real honest with me. If my severity is at an 7 to 8 out of 10, with 10 being the worst, what can I expect long term?</span></span></div></div></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Thanks, Francesca</span></span></div></div></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #0f0f0f; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> </span><br />
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<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><blockquote style="border-left-color: blue; border-left-style: solid; border-left-width: 2px; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 5px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 1.5em; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 5px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"><div style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10pt; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; padding-bottom: 0px; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; padding-top: 0px;"></div></blockquote></div></blockquote></div></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-16889105909204070992011-05-15T13:50:00.001+02:002011-05-15T20:19:22.204+02:00my 9 cat lives - a plate of perfection<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvTJw10wkERcV8rXaEDUXb2gUItLWXzXUD6FFbgCJEQOqh18hc3o3fRTZVDrv-Nd9tY2joTJO9hff3k3zZAJzWfDWbpKAgc64YjZ5hZ53fIcce3QGQOHQUk1ukZQYDuiPuHRrMboTUBSw/s1600/Wine+glass+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvTJw10wkERcV8rXaEDUXb2gUItLWXzXUD6FFbgCJEQOqh18hc3o3fRTZVDrv-Nd9tY2joTJO9hff3k3zZAJzWfDWbpKAgc64YjZ5hZ53fIcce3QGQOHQUk1ukZQYDuiPuHRrMboTUBSw/s400/Wine+glass+1.jpg" width="236" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span class="apple-style-span"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 9pt;">“</span></b></span><span class="apple-style-span"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 9pt;">my favorite’s prosecco, cappuccino, stinky cheese, sweet torta & a little fresh fruit</span></b></span><span class="apple-style-span"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 9pt;">”</span></b></span><b><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 9pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div></td></tr>
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><span class="apple-style-span"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt;">"Life never dishes out plate of perfection without a big serving of bitters on the side!"</span></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: right;"><span class="apple-style-span"><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt;"></span></b></span><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt;">Francesca Owens</span></b></div><br />
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</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-80614897167499689072011-05-15T13:27:00.000+02:002011-05-15T13:41:11.966+02:00franky's picks: "modigliani - man and myth" his life story told by his orphaned daughter<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii-9nhX26e6RqCrwxklof2tUonZc73ykvV3ejwm3UCaxDn2XrgOkBCRrDftZRO-XXJ3-FDjbItRqg45DqHomgBNPHV3sRNpeLgFDEmHSjJgr81b1DNFE4DdMhVvzo7bm5hSoM_zvlvU9w/s1600/jmodi50544681.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEii-9nhX26e6RqCrwxklof2tUonZc73ykvV3ejwm3UCaxDn2XrgOkBCRrDftZRO-XXJ3-FDjbItRqg45DqHomgBNPHV3sRNpeLgFDEmHSjJgr81b1DNFE4DdMhVvzo7bm5hSoM_zvlvU9w/s200/jmodi50544681.jpg" width="139" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI8p2znED1PXUsA2me-SWirQEmE2e-B_9u292uBYLrEkY9TcR63M4uJ5b8WtCYaTe8DrUnZf7acS7JMjJANvKzYCR2yRXI-iWuUbjdgcoiutZp33G2_CVPwXyzkgrN3nPvpNfjACJXY64/s1600/jmodi50544687.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI8p2znED1PXUsA2me-SWirQEmE2e-B_9u292uBYLrEkY9TcR63M4uJ5b8WtCYaTe8DrUnZf7acS7JMjJANvKzYCR2yRXI-iWuUbjdgcoiutZp33G2_CVPwXyzkgrN3nPvpNfjACJXY64/s200/jmodi50544687.jpg" width="144" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjarmm_b72xNYKqBp58DmQI-R4GuVnUj-WwYl1-ty4BFc5zpriTy3tKBMo2UHd8HAktSGL4kaNfm5ToeaTMbgYbO5nN8a6C-Kx-NhuAkkK3puGaCYja4hMICNgmhWb2V_fuMJnmufeoZZ4/s1600/jmodi50544680.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjarmm_b72xNYKqBp58DmQI-R4GuVnUj-WwYl1-ty4BFc5zpriTy3tKBMo2UHd8HAktSGL4kaNfm5ToeaTMbgYbO5nN8a6C-Kx-NhuAkkK3puGaCYja4hMICNgmhWb2V_fuMJnmufeoZZ4/s200/jmodi50544680.jpg" width="139" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSAO3l4eo3g0L2Klpp_EvJ0V1udT86PeTNbtZ_Jg9dyoiBLMbcDQy4Pyj3L0wES84QiKlQzQ6FMk5SQgVZfQgBOcEpxSJO7S7YNesSsegjScUp2NU9CK1T81z3SsuokHAlcDGseVnRgU8/s1600/jmodi50544684.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSAO3l4eo3g0L2Klpp_EvJ0V1udT86PeTNbtZ_Jg9dyoiBLMbcDQy4Pyj3L0wES84QiKlQzQ6FMk5SQgVZfQgBOcEpxSJO7S7YNesSsegjScUp2NU9CK1T81z3SsuokHAlcDGseVnRgU8/s200/jmodi50544684.jpg" width="134" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghn8DhQRIcG7A3Tmrc3sOEv0ZbTbWGaZp_gsytzwZ5XlT8TLVnBW_9O8tlk7eJqY1JIOGUUTwbuD9ACf6Wm8PLxHl9Ay4mHcCqPgaU2K9Qu1wtHdWjT2x5tyjgoik33jaHrYiDlUKc4Fo/s1600/amedeo_modigliani+photo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghn8DhQRIcG7A3Tmrc3sOEv0ZbTbWGaZp_gsytzwZ5XlT8TLVnBW_9O8tlk7eJqY1JIOGUUTwbuD9ACf6Wm8PLxHl9Ay4mHcCqPgaU2K9Qu1wtHdWjT2x5tyjgoik33jaHrYiDlUKc4Fo/s200/amedeo_modigliani+photo.jpg" width="146" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRga72bZmvPofJY_qROdL32ASLPUqPpXL0szqpt40o0FbcaxS10VyNUbL74wnVRLcSdMSnxQS_Mk097HzIa3V9aS9ZxBjGvW75TbNWRkyq4PPWIUS4isBNrTVJKUFvYq3g4zUREot6EHQ/s1600/jmodi50544685.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRga72bZmvPofJY_qROdL32ASLPUqPpXL0szqpt40o0FbcaxS10VyNUbL74wnVRLcSdMSnxQS_Mk097HzIa3V9aS9ZxBjGvW75TbNWRkyq4PPWIUS4isBNrTVJKUFvYq3g4zUREot6EHQ/s200/jmodi50544685.jpg" width="132" /></a></div><br />
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<tr><td class="3text"><div align="center"><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Avant que\.\.\."; font-size: 19.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Modigliani: Man and Myth<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: "Avant que\.\.\."; font-size: 19.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";">by Jeanne Modigliani<o:p></o:p></span></b></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: normal; margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin-bottom: 0in;"><b><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Avant que...';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Translated from the Italian<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div><b><span style="color: black; font-family: 'Avant que...'; line-height: 115%;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">The Orion Press / New York</span></span></b><br />
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</div><div align="left" class="3text"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">This book has been on my coveted book list for years, but the price has been the deterring factor. It has been out of reprint for too long and in the used market it can cost up to $300. Finally last week after buying a 1 year online membership to "questia", I was able to done load it and read it.</span></div><div align="left" class="3text"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="left" class="3text"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I have been ever fascinated by the love story between these two and the driving forces to allow their sole surviving child be orphaned. The facts are recovered her by their child as she learns of her parents' true identify and their tragic ending.</span></div><div align="left" class="3text"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="left" class="3text"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I feel most her for little Jeanne, the orphaned daughter that neither parent could think about to care enough about nor the maternal French grandparents. If it was not for the grace of this child's Italian family their entires stories and little Jeanne's life could be riddled with more mis-truths and pains.</span></div><div align="left" class="3text"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div align="left" class="3text"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">What I hope to find and what I found was quite different in this book. The orphaned daughter did not write from her pain, her loss, her perspective but in the larger scheme she wrote from the factual perspective to speak for her parents legacy... again she placed herself last among the three to preserve their story... </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">for this... I admire little Jeanne the most and want to honor her!</span></div><div align="left" class="3text"><br />
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</tbody></table>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-90145185953865601252011-05-15T12:19:00.002+02:002011-05-15T12:26:48.380+02:00franky's picks: maybe I'm crazy but maybe you are too!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/lAIvDj0PW94?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I remember when, I remember</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">I remember when I lost my mind</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">There was something so pleasant about that place</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Even your emotions have an echo in so much space</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">And when you're out there without care</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Yeah, I was out of touch</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">But it wasn't because I didn't know enough</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">I just knew too much</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Does that make me crazy?</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Does that make me crazy?</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Does that make me crazy?</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Possibly</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">And I hope that you are</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Having the time of your life</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">But think twice</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">That's my only advice</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Come on now, who do you</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Who do you, who do you, who do you think you are?</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px;"><br />
</span></div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Ha ha ha, bless your soul</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">You really think you're in control?</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Well, I think you're crazy</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">I think you're crazy</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">I think you're crazy</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Just like me</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">My heroes had the heart</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">To lose their lives out on a limb</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">And all I remember</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Is thinking, I want to be like them</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Ever since I was little</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Ever since I was little</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">It looked like fun</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">And it's no coincidence I've come</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">And I can die when I'm done</div></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 1px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 1px; color: sienna;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">But maybe I'm crazy</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"></span></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;">Maybe you're crazy</span></span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Maybe we're crazy</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="-webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 2px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 2px; color: sienna;"><div style="text-align: center;">Probably</div></span></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-19397361137917362412011-05-15T12:11:00.003+02:002011-05-15T12:26:19.935+02:00franky's picks: i am woman<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/FLV4BBmjnzM?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;">(Helen Reddy and Ray Burton)</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I am woman, hear me roar</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">In numbers too big to ignore</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">And I know too much to go back an' pretend</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">'Cause I've heard it all before</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">And I've been down there on the floor</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">No one's ever gonna keep me down again</div></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Oh yes, I am wise</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">But it's wisdom born of pain</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Yes, I've paid the price</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">But look how much I gained</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">If I have to</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I can do anything</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am strong (strong)</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am invincible (invincible)</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am woman</div></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">You can bend but never break me</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">'Cause it only serves to make me</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">More determined to achieve my final goal</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">And I come back even stronger</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">Not a novice any longer</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">'Cause you've deepened the conviction in my soul</div></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Oh, yes, I am wise</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">But it's wisdom born of pain</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Yes, I've paid the price</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">But look how much I gained</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">If I have to</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I can face anything</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am strong (strong)</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am invincible (invincible)</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am woman</div></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I am woman watch me grow</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">See me standing toe to toe</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">As I spread my lovin' arms across the land</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">But I'm still an embryo</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">With a long, long way to go</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">Until I make my brother understand</div></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Oh, yes, I am wise</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">But it's wisdom born of pain</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Yes, I've paid the price</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">But look how much I gained</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">If I have to</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I can face anything</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am strong (strong)</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am invincible (invincible)</div></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am woman</div></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">Oh, I am woman</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I am invincible</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I am strong</span></div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 12px; line-height: 17px;"><br />
</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I am woman</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I am invincible</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"></span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;">I am strong</span></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #545559; font-family: verdana; font-size: 13px; line-height: 18px;"><div style="text-align: center;">I am woman</div></span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-16544260430609000572011-05-15T12:00:00.002+02:002011-05-15T12:27:06.146+02:00franky's picks: how to be sick from a Buddhist view...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.howtobesick.com/Images/IndexPicTop.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="193" src="http://www.howtobesick.com/Images/IndexPicTop.png" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ieiqmf8d50o?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe><a href="http://www.howtobesick.com/Images/BookCoverSmall2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://www.howtobesick.com/Images/BookCoverSmall2.jpg" width="217" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">An amazing womans honest story of her illness and her fall from GRACE to arrive to in her bed of suffering. She has spent some time rebuilding her life, just like me. She recreating new dreams that leave room for this brutal illness and embraces it instead of fighting it.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">I wrote her today to get to know here and for her to get to know me. We share a lot in common. Our paths have crossed but not yet intercepted each other. I will try today.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><br />
</span></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5915389178238626822.post-59593908654078148982011-05-15T00:44:00.039+02:002011-05-15T19:16:52.363+02:00it's not my fault - a glimpse into the fate of a child<h2 style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-color: initial; background-image: none; background-origin: initial; border-bottom-color: rgb(170, 170, 170); border-bottom-style: solid; border-bottom-width: 1px; margin-bottom: 0.6em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px; overflow-x: hidden; overflow-y: hidden; padding-bottom: 0.17em; padding-top: 0.5em; width: auto;"><span class="mw-headline" id="Differentiating_PTSD_from_C-PTSD"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; color: black; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; text-align: center;"></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0.4em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-weight: normal;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0.5em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; padding-bottom: 6px; padding-left: 6px; padding-right: 6px; padding-top: 6px; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpHJ19YvezxpgMPgERvJPu38DqpEpYm1qu3M_mg8Gcv-BxMIx-QhRjafiAcTbSAvjJxw_nXv_f6eS1NW7zhnQTfzrYVt0-MqIH_V3vpYKdnKJQAR928PF7O7gkIjNGEKFonugo8oEpl48/s1600/cpts+hotel+room.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpHJ19YvezxpgMPgERvJPu38DqpEpYm1qu3M_mg8Gcv-BxMIx-QhRjafiAcTbSAvjJxw_nXv_f6eS1NW7zhnQTfzrYVt0-MqIH_V3vpYKdnKJQAR928PF7O7gkIjNGEKFonugo8oEpl48/s400/cpts+hotel+room.jpg" width="400" /></a></div></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 13px; padding-top: 4px; text-align: center;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">Body memory flashbacks with out understanding what is going on...</span></b></div></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-pX0R5doqIjZsQdY3WeDOXuvj-6I0_9ZYqwv4srHncOY6KA3VxLA2fy6_G4qYTMOqnPRYsMGEjMT5XalEqthc9pGzbptNwWL84_Ev8sZQFsqtJvIELfxf3gJdewuwkbxaLwHV1w4dgKc/s1600/ptsd+my+childhood.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="231" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-pX0R5doqIjZsQdY3WeDOXuvj-6I0_9ZYqwv4srHncOY6KA3VxLA2fy6_G4qYTMOqnPRYsMGEjMT5XalEqthc9pGzbptNwWL84_Ev8sZQFsqtJvIELfxf3gJdewuwkbxaLwHV1w4dgKc/s400/ptsd+my+childhood.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">A childhood of violence lived through a baby's eyes... mine</span></b></td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVVngJfSg5jZfHeGY7WUgHrNYTvbpto1OI7q79RGz3e_I1U_L3DIYjZCOPazgePO2oTCB6PEZ4nF2McshOnNGQ6TJvv7LjtIoG-vdeHG8L0bXEEos-nN7XeM7jTJii7I7r1JQWNNm8170/s400/feobaby.%25281%2529.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="318" /></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><div class="MsoNormal"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;">Me "Francesca" at the age when my 3 older sisters started passing me out my Shrub Oak N.Y. bedroom window in order for us to the domestic violence</span><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; line-height: 115%;"> </span><span style="font-family: Schoolbell;">within...</span></span></b><b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: Schoolbell; font-size: 10.0pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><br />
I live scanning my environment for unexpected things around me in hopes of reducing the act of surprise. <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><br />
</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">It’s not my fault I stayed awake at night waiting to hear my mother's voice one more time to know </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">she was still alive after dad her hurt</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">It’s not my fault I said my nightly bedtime prayers like every good little Catholic child, Hail </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Mary, Lamb of God and Our Lord’s Prayer except... it always ended with me asking God to kill our father literally before he killed our mother</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">...<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">It's not my fault our mother would drag us out of bed in the middle of the night to escape before our father actually tried to killed us. She would drive from location to location hiding her car behind the A&P grocery, Lakeland High School and </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">St. Elizabeth Mary's Church parking lots till morning</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">It's not my fault my father would load his rifle at night while he was so drunk he could barely walk and then make me carry the flash light out into the dark with him to shoot wild animals </span><br />
<span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">attacking our rabbits</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">.<b><o:p></o:p></b></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">It's not my fault that dad drove our grey hound bus off the highway with just his car when our mother tried to run away and he tracked us down</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Avant que...'; font-size: 15px; line-height: 15px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 19px; line-height: 21px;">It's not my fault yet when it happens too young and too much.one’s body will not forget even when we do.</span> </span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="color: black; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.5em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"></span><br />
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="MsoNormalTable" style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: medium; line-height: normal; width: 655px;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="padding-bottom: 0in; padding-left: 0in; padding-right: 0in; padding-top: 0in;" valign="top"><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><span style="line-height: 27px;">CPTSD </span>Complex Post Traumatic Stres</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">s Disorde</span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">r</span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.sasian.org/books/reviews/herman.htm"><i><span style="color: blue;">Trauma and Recovery</span></i></a></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;"> by Judith Herman, ©1992 by Basic Books.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">A history of subjection to totalitarian control over a prolonged period (months to years). </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Examples include:<span style="line-height: 27px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Hostages<span style="line-height: 27px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Prisoners of war<span style="line-height: 27px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Concentration-camp survivors<span style="line-height: 27px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Survivors of some religious cults<span style="line-height: 27px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #fce5cd; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">Persons subjected to totalitarian systems in domestic life, including:<span style="line-height: 27px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #fce5cd; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">survivors of domestic battering<span style="line-height: 27px;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: #fce5cd; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-size: large;">childhood physical abuse</span></div></td></tr>
</tbody></table><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"> </span></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-weight: normal; line-height: 1.5em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: normal;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"></span></span></div><div style="color: black; font-family: 'Courier New', Courier, monospace; font-weight: normal; margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 36px;"></span></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: large;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 36px;"> </span></span></div></div></div></span></h2>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0